But the truth was, she was never far from his thoughts. She never had been.
Duncan was watching him closely. “I know you want to come over to the Manor,” he said. “I know you want to see her. You’ve been in love with her for years.”
“I’m notin love with her.”
“Oh, yes, you are. You can’t lie to me about this, Thomas. I know you too well.”
“I admire her, certainly. She’s beautiful.”
“It goes beyond that,” Duncan said sagely. “You would court her if you could, wouldn’t you?”
“That could never happen,” Thomas said. In truth, he was a little frustrated with his friend for raising the subject at all. It was difficult to think about a courtship with Lady Valeria, because the truth was that there was nothing he desired more.
“It could happen,” Duncan said. “I’m sure Mother would give her permission. She’s known you all your life. She knows you’re a worthy gentleman.”
Thomas was momentarily distracted. “Why is it your mother’s place to give permission for Lady Valeria to be courted?” he asked. “Isn’t it her brother I would be asking? If Iwereto make such a request, that is.”
“You haven’t heard?” Duncan asked.
“Heard what?”
“Richard was arrested for trading in stolen goods,” Duncan said. “He’s up to his eyeballs in debt, too. That’s why Valeria is coming to stay with us. She’s alone in the world.”
Thomas felt a pang of empathy for the lady he so admired. “That’s awful,” he said quietly. “What a terrible thing to have happen. And it couldn’t have happened to a sweeter lady.”
“Sweeter?” Duncan raised his eyebrows. “You’ve just been telling me how she turned up her nose at you. Now you think she’s sweet?”
“Well… I suppose turning up her nose atmedoesn’t mean she isn’t a sweet persongenerally,” Thomas said.
“You’re in love with her,” Duncan said. “You want to believe the best of her, that’s all.”
Thomas sighed and stared down into his mug. “What difference does it make whether I’m in love with her or not?” he asked. “If I didn’t know better, I would think you were trying to torture me with this, Duncan.”
“Of course I’m not,” Duncan said. “Why don’t you come to the Manor this Friday? Mother’s having a dinner party. You can ask her then whether she’ll consent to have you court Valeria. I know she’ll say yes. Valeria has gone through such trials lately. It will be good for her to have a bit of happiness in her life.”
“It’s not a matter of asking your mother,” Thomas said.
“Yes it is, Thomas. I told you, she’s responsible for Valeria’s affairs.”
“That’s not what I mean. I could never pursue a courtship with a lady who didn’t want it,” Thomas said. “I could never take pleasure in such a match.”
“You can’t have decided that she doesn’t want you based solely on the events of one Christmas ball.”
“Of course not,” Thomas said. “You say that you’ve known for years of my feelings for her, Duncan—don’t you think she’s been aware too?”
“What do you mean?”
“Every time we’ve met—every time she’s visited you at your home and our paths have crossed—I’ve made a point of trying to speak to her. I’ve told her how lovely I find her. I’ve asked her questions about her life—what she enjoys, the books she’s read, her hobbies. I’ve asked her to dance on more than one occasion. And always, she turns me down. She finds a way to put a quick stop to the conversation, and she hurries away. She couldn’t be more clear about the fact that she has no desire to spend time in my company.”
Duncan was quiet for a moment. “I hadn’t realized that,” he said. “I know she’s quiet around strangers—”
“But I wouldn’t say the two of us are strangers,” Thomas said. “If you mention my name to her, I’m sure she’ll know who I am. We’ve interacted on plenty of occasions. She’ll remember me.”
“Maybe she’ll have changed her mind,” Duncan said.
“You seem eager for something to happen between us.”
“Well, it’s just that I know how difficult things have been for her lately,” Duncan said. “She’s left her whole life behind to come here, and I’d like her to have a good time. She deserves something pleasant, for a change. She deserves to feel appreciated, to be taken on outings, and told she’s beautiful. Her brother never treated her very well, you see.”
