“What?” she exclaimed, her own voice filled with anger. “That I fell in love with someone you do not approve of?”
“Yes. And that is why I am insisting you marry Robert. And youwillmarry him.”
Chapter 27
Thea gaped at Freddie, her blood changing to ice in her veins even as her hot rage soared. “I willnotmarry him, Freddie. I love Liam Carter, and you yourself promised I could have a say in who I wed.”
He glared at her, his face thunderous in his own anger. “I did not mean you can resort to a commoner.”
“Nor did you specify,” she retorted. “You cannot force me to marry anyone, not Ampleforth, not the Prince Regent himself. If I cannot have Liam for my husband, then I refuse to marry anyone at all.”
Freddie paced away from her, his shoulders tense, his hand holding his glass of brandy rising as he took a drink. Thea watched his back as he stared out the window into the darkness, her belly roiling with both rage and terror.He cannot force me, he just cannot. The church law will not allow it.Despite her attempts to reassure herself of this, she still feared that she might be wrong.
He finally turned to face her, his face stone cold, his eyes flat and narrowed. “I do not care what you think you can get away with, Thea. You will marry Robert and I plan to make sure you do. I will send this footman away, dismiss him from my service and you will never see him again.”
“Youcannot,” she gasped, horrified. “That is not right, Freddie and you know it.”
“This is my house and I am lord here. I say who stays and who goes, not you.”
“He saved yourlife!”
“And for that I am grateful and I will make certain he is placed for employment in another noble house.” Freddie stared at her. “But his loyal service does not give him the right to you, Thea.”
“I love him. Can you not see that he is good for me,tome? Are you so blinded by your disdain for the common folk that you cannot see the kind of man he is?”
Freddie stared into his glass of brandy. “That does not matter.”
“Only his bloodline matters,” Thea snapped, bitter. “If he held a title, then you would have no trouble letting me marry him. Is that it?”
“Quite honestly? Yes.”
“You make me sick.”
Freddie looked at her as he recognized the venom in her tone. “He all but died saving you, brother,” she snarled. “Liam has done more for us than anyone and he did it out of love for me. He is the kind of man you wish you could be. The man I wish you were.”
His voice toneless, without emotion, shocked her more than his anger when he said, “I have already sent a footman to Robert with a message to come here tomorrow. When he does, I will inform him of your betrothal. Good night.”
Walking past her, Freddie stepped through the door and was gone, leaving her to stare after him, both numb and cold. Her rage ebbed away, leaving Thea filled with stark terror and grief.He will send Liam away, dismiss him. Freddie meant what he said about sending Liam away, and I will never see him again.On feet she scarcely felt, she stumbled to the sideboard to pour herself a glass of sherry.How can I live without Liam? How can I marry a man I fear and despise?
Taking her glass to the closest armchair, she sat down before her legs gave out on her. She drank the liquor, barely tasting it, but felt it spread through her body. The dull ache in her arm died to a whisper. “My life is over,” she said, feeling the need to cry. Yet she could not. She felt empty inside – no emotion at all. No anger, no fear, no love, no joy.
The lamps on the tables burned, illuminating the room, but her soul remained dark, black. Hours she sat, drinking the sherry, staring into nothing save her bleak future. She tried to picture her life with the Baron of Ampleforth, bearing his children, growing into old age without a man at her side she could love. A life without Liam in it, without her protector, her guardian, the only man she could or would ever love.
“Death is far preferable to that fate.”
Not knowing the time, Thea finally stood, suspecting the hours had crawled toward dawn as she made her way out of the drawing room. No one was around as she crossed the entryway of the house toward the stairs, not even Liam, who was to guard her safety.Perhaps Freddie already sent him away.The house was quiet, the sound of her feet echoing as she climbed the steps to the second floor.
Passing the sick room, she hesitated, thinking to go in and check on Liam’s mother. Yet, she realized the servants inside might be sleeping, she decided not to risk waking them. No doubt, Liam himself probably sat vigil by his mother’s bed, and she could not bear to see him right then. If she did, she knew she would lose all her self control. At the moment, that was all she possessed.
Entering her chamber, she found the lamps still lit and Felicity sound asleep on a couch in the sitting room. Passing her abigail by, Thea decided she would not sleep that night at all, and sat in a chair by the window. Her arm throbbed again, making her think about the vial of laudanum at her bedside, but she did not go get it. Her pain was the only thing that made her feel alive.
The sun rose while she still sat, gazing out the window as the sky lightened from pink to golden, the new day bringing Felicity to wakefulness. Thea heard her rise and listened to her footsteps walk toward her.
“Miss Miller?”
“Will you fetch me tea?” she asked, not looking around at her maid.
“Of course. But are you all right? I mean, it does not appear you slept at all.”
