That would set him off like cannon fire.
Freddie would never permit her to marry the one man she loved, the only man she could ever possibly love. His precious sister marry a common servant? Freddie would dismiss Liam from the household, banish him from the estates, then lock Thea in her rooms until her wedding day to whomever he chose for her.
“Miss Miller?”
Guiltily, Thea glanced up to find the grey-haired, portly Lady Harrington watching her with confused, yet kind brown eyes. “I am so sorry, My Lady,” Thea said hastily. “You were saying?”
Lady Harrington smiled sweetly. “I was just making the remark that such a lovely young woman as yourself has not married.”
Thea tried to return her warm look but knew it most likely appeared as false as it felt. “My brother is negotiating with possible husbands, My Lady.”
“Such a nice young man,” Lady Harrington said, glancing around at the others to gain their agreeing nods. “He should be searching for a wife as well.”
Thea nodded. “He met the Countess of Sweetwater at the party and seemed attracted to her.”
“Such a terrible tragedy,” Lady Harrington commented. “She loved her husband so. A fine man, he was, dedicated to her.”
“Did she love him . . . before they got married?”
Lady Harrington appeared baffled for a moment. “Why, I do not know, Miss Miller, though it would appear they did fall in love before their wedding. Yet, their families did negotiate the arrangement long before they met.”
“I see.”
At last, to Thea’s relief, the party broke up for the ladies to return to their rooms to rest, wash and change before supper. Disconsolate, Thea did not glance at Liam as she passed him by, as she strolled amid the other ladies, wishing the floor would open up and swallow her whole.What will happen to him when I marry another man?Sometimes the hero in her romance novels killed themselves or left for foreign countries when they could not marry the women they loved.
Liam would do something equally foolish, she knew, conscious of him not far behind the chattering group.How could my life have turned upside down so?For it had, and she knew the exact moment when it did – when her parents were slain in the robbery.I wonder if Father would have permitted me to marry a common servant.
Reaching her own quarters, she slowly closed the door in Liam’s impassive face as he stood with his back to the wall, on guard. Leaning her back against it, Thea closed her eyes. “I am so sorry I got you into this mess, Liam,” she murmured. “I should never have encouraged you, never fallen in love with you.”
“My Lady?”
Opening her eyes, she found Felicity watching her with concern. “I am just talking to myself. I have been doing that a great deal lately.”
“I often talk to myself when I am trying to sort something out in my mind,” Felicity said brightly.
Though Felicity had been her maid since she was nine years old, Thea never found the older woman to be someone she could confide in. She also knew the abigail was one of the worst gossips the household had seen in years. Thea remembered telling her a guilty secret once when she was about ten years old, and by the next day, she discovered even her mother knew about it.
She never confided in Felicity again.
Pushing away from the door, Thea realized she had no one to turn to any longer. She used to be able to tell her mother things, her secrets, and dreams, and, upon her mother’s death, she had lost her only confidante. Save Liam. Having another woman to talk to would help her sort through her feelings, she suspected, but she had no one at all.
Feeling lonelier than ever, Thea said, “I wish to ride for an hour or so. Fetch riding attire for me, please.”
Felicity turned toward the window. “But the weather appears to be turning to rain, My Lady.”
“Then I will get wet.”
Shortly after, garbed in a dark grey riding habit, her loose hair bound by a ribbon at the nape of her neck, Thea left her chambers. She glanced at Liam as he bowed, and kept her voice formal for the benefit of Felicity who no doubt listened at the door. “I am going riding, Mr. Carter,” she said, her voice flat. “Find another footman to attend me.”
“Yes, My Lady.”
Wishing fervently she could hug Liam and weep into his strong shoulder, Thea kept her face and nose up as she strode quickly down the stairs. Another footman fell in behind her, apparently signaled by Liam, though she did not see it. Outside the house, the breeze had picked up into a light wind with grey clouds looming overhead. Thea almost changed her mind, but she craved some time alone. She needed to escape her worries, her guests and her brother even if for only an hour.
The groom led her placid roan mare from the stable, bowing low before assisting her into her hated sidesaddle. But as she only planned to ride at a quiet walk, Thea chose to tolerate the wretched thing, and settled herself into it and gathered her reins. She shot a glance over and down at Liam, observing the worry in his eyes and thinned lips, even if the rest of his expression maintained stern neutrality.
“I will only walk,” she said as though addressing both of them, but trying to ease Liam’s concern. “You should have no difficulty keeping up.”
Even had she wanted to canter, the footmen would have no choice but to run in her wake. She recalled the last time she cantered this horse and knew she was not a good enough rider to gallop in the sidesaddle. Clucking to the mare, Thea reined her, not down the road, but toward the hills to the northeast of the house. The Willowdale sheep and cattle grazed out that way, and Thea hoped the peacefulness of the views in that direction might soothe her spirit.
