Chapter 27
James walkedAnnabelle into his dining room. It was a room that always made her feel like she could breathe that much deeper. With its big windows and pale yellow walls, it was a room that felt so much bigger and airier than it was. The sun streamed through, flickering off the wood from the table, giving a magical feel to theplace.
But for some reason, Annabelle could not relax today, she could not find the comfort that she usually did and she was not sure why. Her eyes kept darting over to James as if she was expecting him to do somethingcrazy.
“Are you alright?” he asked her while giving her a curious look. “You are giving me a funnylook.”
Annabelle curled her hands around one another nervously. Her heart raced painfully in her chest and her tongue felt too thick for her mouth. Her instincts were screaming at her that something was not normal. She took a seat on the wooden chair along James’s medium sized dining table and she peered up at him through hereyelashes.
He is a terribly handsome man, she thought to herself with a smile playing on her lips. I am terribly lucky that he has shown an interest in me... especially considering what I have beenthrough.
When James first began courting her, Annabelle told him an edited version of her past. She explained to James about the unwise engagement to Lord Ashdown and how it made her feel, she even gave him a little bit of information about Floyd, but she played down the finer details of their time together. For instance, she told James that she left home to escape her engagement, but she did not let him know that she was not alone when she did. She informed James about her attraction to the stable boy, but she did not tell him that theykissed.
She just did not want him to judge her for being ruined. She also wanted to keep everything that she had with Floyd all to herself. It was like a delicious secret or a dream that only she could access. After everything that she had been through, she felt like she deserved to have a little something that was just forher.
"I am terribly sorry, I do not mean to give you a funny look," she replied coyly. "I do not know what is wrong with me today. I feel very out ofsorts.”
James walked over to where Annabelle was sitting and he lightly brushed his finger along her cheek. He was so careful not to touch her in a way that was considered inappropriate that she could hardly feel his fingers at all. It was delicate and sweet, nothing like the way that Watson had touched her, but it also meant that she could not work out just how she felt because ofit.
“You do not look unwell,” he commented with his head cocked to one side. “You look just as beautiful asever.”
Annabelle’s chest swelled. The compliment affected her greatly. It was lovely to hear that he still found her just as pretty when she had been busy at work all day. He meant it too. James was a man who only spoke words that he trulybelieved.
“Thank you very much, that is kind of you to say.” She tucked a stray strand of red hair behind her ear and stared up at him with curiosity in her gaze. “Is everything alright with you? You do not seem quite like yourselfeither?”
James instantly shrank in on himself as he took a step back. His entire body language changed in a way that had Annabelle absolutely petrified. She could not help fearing that something awful was about to happen. She gripped tightly onto the chair underneath her, trying her best to keep herselfsteady.
James ran a hand through his dark hair and he shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. His shoulders hunched up around his ears and he took in a deep sigh as he tried to prepare himself for what was clearly something very challenging that he had to saynext.
“Thereissomething that I wish to discuss with you,” he said cautiously. Annabelle sucked in and held a breath as she waited to see what he would say to her next. “And it is something that I find difficult toexpress.”
Annabelle’s knuckles turned white, her brain started to spin, her imagination immediately took her to the darkest places possible. She immediately started to think that James was about to break off their courtship, which was a horrifying thought that would immediately send her back intoloneliness.
Maybe he has met someone who can give him more of herself than I can. Maybe he has met his true love. Maybe I am about to end up all aloneagain.
“Y... yes?” she stammered awkwardly. “What is it?” When James did not immediately answer her, the panic gripped her wholly. “James, please tell me. What is goingon?”
James bit down on his bottom lip and he sat in the seat opposite her. He held out his hands for her to hold and with a tremble and a shake she forced her palms towards his. The look that James was giving her was utterly unreadable, which did not help Annabelle with her nerves atall.
“Lady Annabelle Hathaway, I was wondering...” He gulped noisily as he scanned his brain desperately trying to find the right words. “We have been courting for a while and I believe it might be time to make thatofficial.”
Annabelle’s heart stopped dead in her chest. She had not been expecting that at all. She had steeled herself, waiting for the worst to happen so this was a completely unexpectedturnaround.
“What do you mean,official?”
Logically, she understood, but her brain had not yet processed the words to allow her to fully understandyet.
“I would like to marry you,” James eventually asked gruffly. “I would like you to be my wife. I do not have a bejewelled ring for you which I know is what you deserve, I just thought it better to spend the money on a wonderful ceremonyinstead.”
His cheeks tinged with a pink embarrassment as he slid the band over Annabelle’s finger. She had not even answered him, but it seemed that he presumed it would be a yes. James was so busy worrying that he could not afford quite the luxury that the Lord who she was engaged to before him, that he did not see the shock and fear in Annabelle’seyes.
I should marry him, Annabelle thought to herself. This is a wonderful offer and he is a great man. I should be lucky to be James’swife.
She did not even glance down to see the ring, not that it would have mattered. Annabelle knew better than anyone that material possessions did not mean a thing. It would not matter if James had proposed with absolutely nothing. That was not causing her topause.
He is not Floyd, she could not help thinking despite herself. He is not the man I thought I wouldmarry.
Even though five years had passed, even though she presumed that she had completely recovered from their ill-fated, badly timed affair, she could not stop him from cropping up into her brain at this monumentalmoment.
