“No.” Danielle shook her head.
“Why?” Nova asked.
“Because we haven’t decided if we want to have a baby.”
Did Danielle want kids? We hadn’t talked about it. I guess when you propose a temporary arrangement instead of a real marriage, there are some conversations that get missed.
I’d never wanted children. After I’d learned that Jacqueline’s son wasn’t mine, the idea of ever putting myself in a position where there was a possibility of losing a child again wasn’t appealing. Actually, it was downright terrifying. Even letting myself love Danielle was a big step. The idea of adding a child into that mix… I wasn’t sure how to do that.
But Danielle looked so at ease and natural with Nova in her arms. She would make an amazing mom.
“Hey.” Danielle broke me out of my thoughts. She reached over and squeezed my hand. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” I said with a smile I hoped was convincing.
She put Nova back down so the little girl could reclaim her marshmallow from Dion. And then she was putting her hands on either side of my face, forcing me to look at her. “What’s going on?”
“Do you want kids?”
She blinked. “Um. Maybe we should have this conversation somewhere else.”
“Forget it.”
“No, I’m not going to forget it.” She led me to the sliding glass door that opened into Sierra’s kitchen. The whole bottom floor was an open concept with only a half wall separating the kitchen, dining room, and living room. It was beautiful, but not ideal for privacy.
Danielle pulled me through the kitchen to a large bathroom with a marble tub and double sinks. She shut the door behind us and flicked the lock.
When she turned to face me, she looked almost… guilty.
“Sunday School? What’s going on?”
She took a deep breath and gripped the counter behind her tight enough to turn her knuckles white. “I probably should have told you this before.”
“Told me what?” A spark of fear lit in my chest, and I braced myself for her words to shatter my life.
“I’m not opposed to having kids, but there’s a very good chance I won’t be able to.”
“What?” I blinked. Of all the things I’d been expecting her to say, that wasn’t it.
She bit her lip and lowered her eyes to the tile floor between us. “It’s not that I can’t have them. It’s just that my chances of getting pregnant are significantly lower than the average person’s.”
I closed the distance between us and lifted her chin so she had to look at me. “Baby, I don’t care if we never have kids. I want you. And if all I have is you, that’s more than enough.”
“But do you want kids?”
“Not particularly. Up until a few months ago, I was one hundred percent against marriage. Kids were out of the question.”
“But what if you change your mind?”
“You really think hypothetical children I’ve never wanted are going to become more important to me than you? Do you think so little of me, Sunday School?”
“But—”
“No. There are no buts. I. Love. You. End of story.”
“Hayden…”
“Shh. Do you trust me?”
