At some point I must have moved, because my fingers were gripping the lapels of his jacket for dear life. I was terrified that if either one of us let go, I wouldn’t be able to stand on my own. I couldn’t even tell you which way was up. There was nothing but him and how he was devouring me like he was starving and I was his last meal.
Whistles and hoots sounded, but Hayden completely ignored them.
When he finally pulled back, he didn’t go far, pressing his forehead to mine. We were both breathing hard, our breath mingling in the mere inches of space between our lips.
“What was that?” I gasped out.
“You taste even better than I remember,” he whispered.
What in the world was that supposed to mean? Hayden had always kissed me like he loved it, like it was his life mission, but then he’d dropped me like it was nothing. So how dare he comment on my taste or kiss me like he still had that right? He didn’t. He’d ruined us and everything I’d thought we were building.
He slowly dropped his hands from my body, as if he was reluctant to let me go. “We should go do pictures.”
I nodded, but I was barely aware of the action. A numbness was starting to take over. It was my mind’s way of protecting me from my reality. I’d been doing it since as long as I could remember. Moving to Earth afterjoining the secret order had helped, but sometimes, no matter what I did, I couldn’t push it away.
A tiny crease appeared between Hayden’s brows. “You okay?”
I nodded again even though the action felt like a lie. How was I supposed to survive nine months of being married to him if I was already falling apart after less than nine minutes?
We spent the next half hour posing while the photographer Hayden had hired took at least a dozen pictures of the two of us. The New England winter created a beautiful snowy backdrop outside the window behind us, and I knew the pictures would be stunning.
“Are you all right?” Hayden asked for what had to be the hundredth time since we’d started the photo session.
“I’m fine.”
He ran his hands up and down my bare arms, causing the skin to pebble in the wake of his touch. “Are you cold?”
“No.”
“You have goose bumps.”
I bit back a laugh. He was right, but they had nothing to do with my being cold and everything to do with his attempt to warm me up. “I’m fine.”
“We should get you away from the window.”
“But it’s so beautiful.”
“It’s not worth you freezing to death.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not freezing.” I turned so I was leaning back against his chest and pulled his arms around my waist. “Now smile for the camera.”
“Jesus, woman, were you raised in the North Pole or something?”
“Or something,” I said. Due to my deal with Beelzebub, I’d never told Hayden about my childhood in Heaven. I’d told him my brothers in the secret order were the only family I had that mattered, and we’d left it at that.
We went through a couple more poses before our photographer gave us a nod.
“Anything else you want?” she asked.
I glanced up at Hayden. This was his show after all.
“Take some of just Danielle,” he said, giving me a look that was downright predatory.
I frowned at him. “Why?”
“Because I want a picture of you, just you, in that fucking dress that I really wish I was taking off you tonight.”
Silence followed his words. I could see the shock in his eyes and his aura both, and I was sure the same shock was mirrored on my face. Did I hear that right? In the year we’d been together, Hayden hadn’t once pushed to take things to a sexual level. Not after learning that I wanted to wait until I was married.
