I wasn’t sure where Zeb went after the meeting, and I decided it wasn’t important. His actions were Micah’s responsibility now. I didn’t have to worry about his plans anymore.
He did send me a text Sunday night though.
Z
I’m sorry.
Just two words. But they were two words I’d never imagined I’d hear from the Prince of False Idols.
I hadn’t responded, and I didn’t hear from him again as the days went by.
Hayden and I returned to his penthouse—sorry,ourpenthouse—and fell back into the life we’d been living, but better. Our marriage felt real in a way I hadn’t allowed it to before. There were no more secrets or lies between us. We couldn’t change the past, but we were learning to move forward together.
Robert passed away the day after Father’s Day.
We went over to be with Allison as soon as we heard. Hayden held his mother while she cried, and I saw the tears in his own eyes, but he didn’t want to talk about it. With anyone.
“What can I do?” I asked as we lay in bed that night.
Hayden tucked me closer into his chest. “There’s nothing that can be done.”
“It’s okay to feel, Hayden.”
“I know.”
I pressed a kiss to his bare chest. “If you want to talk about it at all, I’m here, okay?”
“I know.”
We lay in silence, with me cocooned in his arms, for so long I was sure he’d fallen asleep.
“I’m not sure what to feel,” he whispered finally. “I’m sad but I’m also kind of relieved, and then I feel guilty for feeling relieved. What does that say about me?”
“That you had a complicated relationship with him.”
“I feel like a fraud every time someone says they’re sorry or offers me condolences. Like I don’t deserve their sympathy. I’m still so mad at him, even now. We’ll neverget the chance to repair our relationship, and I’m not sure I care. Does that make me a horrible person?”
“No. There’s no rule book for how you have to feel.”
“You don’t think I’m wrong?”
“I think you need to deal with this in your own time. I hope you can eventually forgive him and find a place where you can look back on the good without it being clouded out by the disappointment and hurt. But no one else can walk that path for you or tell you how to do it.”
His arms tightened around me. “I don’t know what I’d do without you right now.”
“I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”
THIRTY-FOUR
Hayden
Me
Are you on your way?
I was pacingthe parking lot outside my father’s lawyer’s office, waiting for Danielle before I went inside to go over the will. Apparently Dad had wanted it read to the two of us before the rest of the family. I thought I had a good idea what it was going to say, but that did nothing to calm the restless energy running through me.
My phone buzzed in my hand, and I smiled at the name that appeared on the screen.
