I shook my head sharply, trying for what had to be the hundredth time to put those thoughts behind me.
“You all right?” Roth asked.
I hadn’t even heard him come into the living room. He dropped onto the other couch. There was a concerned look on his face that I hadn’t seen even when he left me with Soneillon.
Great, I’d reached a point where I had the Prince of Theft worried about my mental state. This had to be some kind of record low.
I fiddled with my hair, staring at it like it was the most fascinating thing I’d ever seen. I’d gotten rid of the dye a week ago, when I’d finally managed to leave Asmodeus’s house.
I wished we could just hide out in Roth’s mansion indefinitely, but I knew the arrangement wasn’t going to work long-term. Which was why we were going to another party tonight. Something I didn’t feel ready to face at all.
“Do you remember the last thing I told you before I left you in the prison realm?” Roth asked.
“To enjoy my stay in Hell?”
“Before that,” he said, waving away my words.
“To hold on to my faith.”
“Temptation is a part of life always, but in the Devil’s court, it is the air we breathe. We’re all drawn to certain sins, but we also feed off the indulgence of others. You don’t stand a chance on your own.”
“What are you saying?” I asked. I was tired and didn’t have the brain space to pick apart riddles right now.
“That no one is strong enough to survive this court alone—you need faith or you will become a slave to sin.”
“What if I can’t make it?” I whispered.
Roth gave me his sad smile, the one he’d worn when we were in Heaven’s garden. “Right now you are standing on a tightrope between two different kinds of surrender. You can let sin win, or you can let faith win. Either way, all you have to do is fall. You only fail if you try to stay on the tightrope, if you forfeit your choice.”
“You make it sound so easy.”
“Not easy. Simple.”
“Either way, it doesn’t fix what’s already happened.”
Roth smirked at me. “On the scale of things to regret in life, trying to sleep with the guy you obviously have very strong feelings for and getting yourself off don’t really rank very high. Trust me,fallingfrom Heaven had a much harder landing.”
I winced, but Roth didn’t seem to share my discomfort.
“There’s a dress waiting for you upstairs. Stop moping and go get ready to charm your way into the Prince of Darkness’s palace.”
Dresswas a bit of a stretch. The gown Roth had left for me had a floor-length skirt and a top that barely covered more than a bra would. Both were the same burgundy shade as the skirt I’d worn to Mammon’s party. I wasn’t complaining. I liked the color and it suited me. The only problem was the top laced down the back and it was impossible for me to tie it myself.
I wouldn’t put it past Roth to have purposely picked a dress I’d need help putting on in some attempt to force me to get over my embarrassment from last weekend.
“Dammit,” I muttered.
“What’s wrong?” Joriel asked from the doorway to the bathroom where I was changing.
“I can’t tie the dress myself,” I said, not turning to look at him. “It’s fine. I can—” I cut myself off when his fingertips brushed my back.
“I’ve got it.”
I swear his voice had gotten more alluring in the past week. There was no way it had sounded like that the whole time we’d known each other, like a caress against my skin.
“How does that feel?” he asked as the ribbon tightened against my back.
“Good,” I answered, sounding way less calm than I’d have liked.
