It would be cute if I wasn’t a walking tornado of feels right now.
If only Trina hadn’t cornered me with her half-baked plan. If only Vance hadn’t tried to touch me.
Fuck!
I came too close tonight. My veins pulsing with venom, the energy coiling up inside me, the rush of adrenaline and desire mixing into a potent fuel. The kind I had to learn to control before it destroyed me and the people I cared about.
I haven’t wanted to hit someone that badly since I stopped fighting for good almost twenty years ago.
“What about your stuff?” I ask.
Was there a part of me that hoped she’d stay at my place alittle longer and that’s why I found a hundred excuses not to take her belongings back to her place today?
“I’ll be okay until you’re home again.”
I pull down her driveway and park so my headlights wash over her front door. Since she’s so capable, I let her leverage out of the cab and tuck her crutches under her arms without my help.
“Thank you,” she says without looking at me, and shuts the door.
I watch her swing to her porch, my cold, dead heart cracking a little more for every inch of space that she puts between us.
Once she’s safely behind her door, I back up her driveway and park in mine. Then I head inside. But passing by the guest room, I catch a hint of her scent at the same moment I spot her bag on the bed.
Upstairs, I walk into the bathroom to brush my teeth, but her shampoo bottles are still on the shelf next to the tub. It takes an extraordinary amount of effort not to sweep them from sight. Or throw them against the wall and watch them explode.
It looks like you might actually care about her, so I’ll say this nicely. Be honest with her. Don’t advertise yourself for a role you don’t plan to satisfy.
I need a distraction. Something to get the train back on the tracks.
After shutting off the faucet, I push off the counter and hurry downstairs to the shower. I’ve barely got the water hot before I’m bracing against the tiles with my cock in my fist. I picture Meg’s tongue flicking down my shaft, imagine the softness of her mouth as she takes me deep.That’s it, shortcake.
But the relief I find when groaning her name as I come lasts only as long as it takes to catch my breath.
I rest my forehead against the shower tiles as the water cascades down my back. There has to be some other cure for this.
Because I’m dangerously close to losing control. I’ve even started bargaining with myself.
Kissing her at the upcoming retirement party like it won’t mean anything.
Beating Vance to a pulp for getting into Meg’s space like she’s mine to protect.
Imagining more moments together like the past two days as if there’s a possibility she could ever want more from me.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
All of these little missteps are proof I’m gunning for a fall.
When I get to work, I almost wish Vance’s car was here so I’d have a reason to be an asshole. He must have done a swap yesterday, or he had vacation time.
At muster, there’s a new face. William Hayes. Fresh out of the academy. He looks like a younger version of Zach, with the same intense blue eyes and thick dark hair. I drink in his eager expression and the keen way he’s observing everything without commenting or drawing attention to himself. As a quarterback, he’s used to calling the shots. How does he feel stepping into this new role at the bottom of the heap?
“Hayes will be with the engine crew today,” our station chief says as he wraps up our briefing, nodding at me and Scotty.
“Yes, sir,” I reply as Hayes and I lock eyes.
Life as a probie isn’t easy, but if he’s tough like his brother, he’ll do fine.
We tackle the janitorial duties then move to the trucks. Scotty takes Hayes through the crash truck’s checklist while Hickman and I inventory and fill bottles.
