Andthey all heard.Whichwasn’t hard, becauseIhave the volume turned up all the way from whenIwas listening to music in the shower earlier.
Ilook up to see every person around the table looking at me.Justblinking.Ilaugh nervously. “Justa little joke between me and”—Iclear my throat asIpush the phone back into my pocket. “Sorry,Iforgot to turn the sound off before dinner.”
Blakeis the first one to break the silence by saying, “Who’sup for some flag football?”
Fora split second,I’mgrateful toBlakefor ending the awkwardness.Butdid he have to do it by suggesting we play asport, after having just heard my soccer story?
Jaceturns to me as he reaches under the table to place a hand on my knee.Ina quiet voice, he says, “Wedon’t have to play football.Wecan do something else.”
ButIget the sense that this is a common after-dinner activity here.AndIalso understand thatJace’ssiblings are trying to see ifIfit into the family.Ilove this family andIdo want to show thatIfit in.
SoIfind myself saying, “I’dlove to play.”
CHAPTER33
A SPIRALING SITUATION
MACKENZIE
Thehouse is suddenly full of movement as everyone clears the table, puts away the remaining food, grabs the football and the waistbands with the flags, and we all head outside.
Jaceclips the band of my flags around my waist, which is now comfortably full.Iwould eatEvelynLancaster’scooking every day of the week ifIcould.Itake the moment that we’re away from everyone to ask whatIreally wanted to do during dinner but worried it might come out sounding rude. “Ican’t believe your mom has a job as intense as being theCSADirectorand still has time to cook a meal like that.”
Jacelooks up at me from where he’s crouched at my waist. “Oh, she didn’t cook dinner.”Hestands. “She’sjust every bit as good at directing her personal assistant as she is everyone at work.Mealslike this are always catered.”Helaughs. “Sometimeswhen we were growing up, she would cook for us.Butit was things like corn dogs, tater tots, and frozen vegetable medley, and they were usually under- or over-cooked.Shemay be good at a lot of things, but cooking isn’t one of them.”
Forsome reason, this makes me rather relieved.Maybeit’s becauseI’mstarting to picture a life withJace, andI’mmore than a little intimidated by how amazing his mom is.Iread something once that said a man will often judge his wife by the standards set by his mom, which can either be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the mom.
(WhenIfirst heard that, allIcould think of was how badIfelt for any daughter-in-law ofMarthaStewart.Well, except for the going to prison part.Maybethat brought the bar down just a bit.)
Iglance over atEvelyn, who is clipping her own flags on, andIrealize that knowing she didn’t cook the meal makes me respect her even more.Notbecause she can do it all, but because she knows she can’t and is willing to ask for help.
Myphone (whichInow have silenced) buzzes in my pocket, andIpull it out to see that it’s my mom.Again.Shecalled right as we were pulling into the driveway, too, and ifIdon’t answer soon, she’ll probably alert theNationalGuard.Thegame doesn’t look quite ready to start yet, soIanswer just asBlakewalks past and pauses to say something toJacein a low voice.
“Hi,Mom.”
Ilisten for a minute, and then pull the phone away from my mouth a bit and say toJace, “She’sjust calling to verify that we are going to be thereFridaynight for myDad’sbirthday party.”
WhenJaceasked me to come join his family for dinner, my dad’s birthday get-together had already been planned, soIimmediately asked if he wanted to come to my family thing.I’mthrilled he said yes.Sincethey live further away, it’s not like we get together for a family dinner once a week or anything.
“Oh, yeah,”Jacesays as he’s clipping the strap of his flags around his waist. “Ofcourse.”Buthe says it like he’s faking… not enthusiasm, exactly, because the way he says it doesn’t resemble anything close to enthusiasm.Acceptance, maybe?Itsounds like he’s just confirming that he agreed to go and nothing more.
“We’llbe there,Mom.I’vegot to run, butI’llsee youFriday.”
Ihang up the phone and then askJace, “Doyou not want to go?”
“No, of course,Iwant to meet your family.”
Butsomething is off.Itry to study his expression more, but he just pastes on a smile and turns toward the middle of his backyard where everyone is gathering.Worrystarts to worm its way in.Somethingis definitely weird ifJaceis having trouble planning anything with me in the future, especially when that future is only four days away.
Lastnight,Ihad an awful dream whereJaceandImeet for gelatos and he tells me that he doesn’t actually want to be with me.ThatIam only an assignment.Hehadn’t wanted it to seem like that, though, so he chose to not break it off with me immediately after the mission ended but now feels like it is time.Jace’swords just now say we are still on forFriday, but something about his reaction made me think of a dreamImight not have ever remembered otherwise.
Everyoneis wearing flags and lining up to play, evenHeidi.She’swearing the cutest little toddler version of flags at her hips and she has already pulled off three people’s flags.Andnot only has the game not started, but they were the flags of her own teammates!Atleast with her in the game,Iknow it won’t be a hard-played one.
Charlie,Ledger,Jace, andIline up in the middle of the backyard facingBlake, his daughter,Emerson,Miles, andEvelyn, andJacehikes the ball toLedger.
Sevenplays in,I’mbreathing hard and have already had my flags pulled seven times.Halfof them byHeidi. (Thegirl is relentless!)Welose the ball quickly, and the other team scores just as quickly.Adozen plays in, andI’velost my flags a dozen times and the other team has scored twice.
It’strue that our team has a complete newbie who’s sports-challenged (me), but the other team has a two-year-old.Outof me andHeidi,I’mpretty sure she has contributed more.Especiallybecause they’ve had her run the ball a few times, and we let her get pretty far with it.
