He reached a hand down to where I was reading at the couch and pulled me to standing. “You have to get past being afraid of your magic, Jorah. The sooner you do that, the better you’ll feel.”
I gaped at him. “Excuse me? Krew just handed me over all but a drop of his magic, when I had been terrified for even a drop of it, and I am just supposed to accept it, no reservations at all, when this is something I have feared for the majority of my life?”
Owen put a hand on my shoulder. “I get it. I do. But being afraid of your magic is only going to make you miserable. My hope is the more used to it you get, the easier it’ll be.”
“And if it is never easy?” I snapped.
He wrapped his arms around me. “Hey. I get it. We will cross that bridge when we get to it. Right now I am only asking you to try to bring your magic up, then press it back down. That’s it. Come on, you’re a natural already. You’ve got this.”
“Owen, I busted a tub, and healed a tree without even meaning to.”
He shrugged while still hugging me. “Minor details.”
Already feeling somewhat angry at him, and Krew, and everything they were asking of me these last two days, it took very little effort to let the magic come to my palms. In a dramatic flair, I let it continue, weaving up my arms and down the rest of me.
The very odd and somehow good news about all this was that it had a warming effect on my skin and I did hate to be cold.
“Okay, now calm it,” Owen commanded.
I closed my eyes only because I couldn’t stop glaring at him. I repeated what I’d told my magic earlier.Not yet. Not yet.As I opened my eyes back up, I repeated it again, taking a deep breath as I did.
It took about a minute, but as soon as all traces were gone, I looked back to Owen. “Are you happy now?”
He grinned. “Yes, but no. By the end of the week, you need to be able to do that in seconds, if not faster. Try again.”
I rolled my eyes. “I loathe you right now.”
“That’s fine,” Owen offered. “I can take it. My job right now isn’t to be your friend, Jorah. My job right now is to be your guard and keep you safe from the king at the next ball. Plus, I thought we had already established that I’m pushy.”
As frustrated as I was, I couldn’t help but smirk.
So he walked me through the same thing again, and again, and again. By the fourth time, I was faster, but a sheen of sweat had broken out on my forehead. It was exhausting playing with my magic, tempting it, but then keeping it at bay. And if it was exhausting doing so in a safe space, I couldn’t imagine what being around the king would do to me.
“Go take your shower, Your Grace,” Owen said as he turned me toward the bathroom. “Then I’ll let you take another nap.”
I stomped toward the shower. “And here I thought marrying into the royal family would’ve givenmethe power to bossyouaround.”
CHAPTER5
After Owen had convinced me to practice tempering my magic twice more that afternoon, I’d been too exhausted to even make it through dinner. Falling asleep while eating with Krew, he’d apparently moved me to bed and left to practice with Keir.
I woke to voices a few hours later. Owen and Krew. They were in front of the fire, speaking softly. I was sure to keep both my magic and my emotions calm, wanting to know what they were whisper-yelling about.
“But is it enough?” Owen snapped. Very rarely had I heard him take that tone with Krew.
“Won’tsheknow if it is enough or not? She seems to be doing fine today,” Krew defended.
Owen shook his head. “She has no idea if she’s fine or not. She moved that trunk like it weighed next to nothing today. We havenoidea what she is capable of. None.”
From what I could see, Krew grabbed at his hair. I didn’t have to pull on the invisible tether between us to understand he was worried.
“She is still scared of it,” Owen continued. “As long as she fears it, suppressing it too much can make her dangerous.”
I fought to keep my emotions calm and even. I felt my magic rising to the surface. Their words were similar to what they had told me earlier that day in the forest, but I hadn’t realized just how serious of a problem this apparently was.
Though my magic calmed on command, becoming easier with every time I did it, I must have thoroughly failed on the emotional side of it. Because I felt Krew send through the bond to me,Did we wake you?
Yes.
