Part of his job.
Right. Because I’d paid him for this, and he was making the best of it.
“Sure,” I managed. “Let’s sleep for a while, okay?”
He gave me a funny look, like he knew damn well I was desperate to change the subject, but he only said, “Sure, Brook,” and settled down again, his head next to mine.
I lay there staring at the ceiling, Dimitri on top of me and all around me, the heavy warmth of his body, his citrusy alpha scent, the bond woven around us both. I’d thought paying for a mate would avoid unnecessary complications. That it’d make sure I could get what I wanted and then move on.
Christ. I’d really miscalculated. And denial only went so far; I’d hit the end of the road.
Whether it was the mate bond influencing me—and I knew, Iknew, rationally, that bonds didn’t really work like that—or some flaw, some weakness in me, or simply Dimitri himself, all the good qualities I’d never expected him to have, the way he’d given me what I’d never known I wanted…well, I wouldn’t be moving on. Not easily, anyway.
And that made the prospect of getting what I wanted, and thus getting Dimitri out of my life, a lot less appealing.
I wanted to put my arms around him. Touch him, feel the texture of his skin, soak in as much of his heat as possible.
He wouldn’t welcome that.
So I lay there with my arms at my sides and closed my eyes, determined to get myself under control even though my chest had a hollow, echoing space in it that made me sick and shaky.
I had a plan for my life. I’d stick to that. What choice did I have?
Chapter 14
Family
Dimitri went to work with me the next day, imposing in his sharp suit and towering over me as he followed me into my first meeting, a presentation to the board about my strategy for my department.
Having him at my back felt…not comforting, because I was a professional, and I didn’t need to be comforted at work. Emotions weren’t my primary mode there. But it did give me the confidence you could only really get from having someone, well, at your back. Supporting you in anything you did, and making sure you knew that no matter what, there was at least one person in the room who wouldn’t dismiss you.
When had I started counting on Dimitri to be there to support me rather than being annoyed that I needed him in the first place?
Maybe around the same time I’d started looking forward to coming home from work on those days he didn’t go with me, knowing that my house wouldn’t be cold and empty and lonely, with nothing to eat and no one to talk to and no reason to do anything but keep working.
“The two of you make a good team,” one of our most annoying board members told me as we walked out of the conference room. He favored me with a condescending smirk. “His influence has really improved the quality of your presentations.”
Okay, sothatrankled, and I glared at his retreating back as he sauntered off to do whatever board members did when they weren’t terrorizing junior executives. Stare in the mirror and congratulate himself on being so awesome, maybe? Asshole. My presentation had actually been almost precisely the same the last time I’d tried to give it, only this time, I’d had an alpha sitting there nodding along.
I felt Dimitri behind me before he spoke, a whiff of his scent and the heat of him wrapping around me.
“You think next time you should put a life-size photo of my knot in the middle of your slide deck to make it even better?” he grumbled in my ear. “Asshole.”
And just like that, my fury evaporated. Even a stopped clock was right twice a day; Dimitri and I did make a good team, only not the way that prick thought we did. It wasn’t his omnipotent alphaness making me better. It was the two of us working together to manipulate assholes like the ones on the board into doing what I wanted them to do.
It gave me the courage to bring up the issue of Dimitri’s family and my mother’s demands about the mating reception, although I waited until we were in the car on the way home, cruising along in moderate traffic and with a comfortable silence between us.
Dimitri leaned back, sighed, and yanked at his tie, loosening it until he could pull it over his head and fling it into the back seat.
The first time he’d done that I’d expostulated with him about treating silk that way.
Now it only made me smile.
My belly clenched, heavy and cold. God, what was I going to do when he left me?
For that matter, what washegoing to do? Maybe I could ask him to stick around for a while. Give him that stipend he’d mentioned. Would he be willing to stay if I paid him?
That cold, weighty sensation only intensified at the thought.
