He practically purrs against me in response, lapping at me like he's been starving for my taste. I gasp and shiver, clinging to reality by the skin of my teeth.
He rips that away with his teeth riding across my clit. The sharp sting blooms to pleasure, leaving me sobbing his name.
"That's it," he growls as I rock against him again, using my hold on his hair as leverage to help me move. "Fuck my face just like that, baby. Don't stop."
Ican'tstop. God help us both, but I don't think any force on earth could stop me from chasing the thrill right now. It's too damn good, like ecstasy poured directly into my veins. I feel him everywhere, igniting every nerve ending.
I fly over the edge with a soft shout, my legs buckling beneath me.
He grunts, wrapping his arms around me to keep me upright as he keeps going, licking me through the aftershocks pinging through my system.
By the time he finally releases me, I can't even breathe. I'm just a bundle of panting, shaking bliss.
"Did that feel good, princess?" he asks, pulling me down into his arms.
I curl up with my face buried in his throat, my heart still pounding. "Yes," I manage to whisper.
"Tasted good too." He brushes his lips across my crown, holding me tightly. For long moments, we stay just like that, locked together in the grass and dirt, the shed hiding us from view.
I feel like I should say something, but I don't know what to say.
Please don't break mefeels a little too real. Perhaps because I'm coming to realize that this is real. That he has a power over me that no one ever has before. And that scares the shit out of me and doesn't scare me nearly enough at the same time.
"Did you come out here for this?" he asks, breaking the silence between us.
"No." I pause. "Yes." A soft breath huffs from my lips. "I don't know."
He tips my head back, forcing me to look at him. "What are you so afraid of, Zoya?"
"Nothing," I lie, before the truth immediately follows. "Everything. How much do you know about Nadia and Teo?"
"Not much."
"They've been in love forever," I whisper. "Like, even as kids, everyone knew they were going to end up together. But Teo decided to leave high school early when he was given a spot on the football team at UT for the next season, and it tore them apart. Nadia was devastated. When he came home for Christmas that year, they got into a big fight. She ran out of there and ended up in a car accident."
"Jesus," he whispers. "I'd heard about the accident, but not everything else."
"Yeah." I sigh softly. "Teo is the one who pulled her from the car. He wouldn't leave her side in the hospital until she started coming around. He blamed himself, and I guess he figured she wouldn't want to see him. But when Nadia woke up without him, she broke all over again. She didn't want to hear anything anyone said about him. We couldn't even say his name to her. She was convinced that he never felt the same way about her." I pause, gathering my thoughts. "That accident changed their lives in a lot of ways. We lost part of both of them that night. Teo started getting into fights. Nadia ended up in rehab twice, trying to deal with PTSD. It was…terrifying."
He listens quietly, letting me spill it all.
"I guess what they went through didn't just scar them. It scarred us all in some way."
"How did it scar you, princess?" he asks, searching my gaze.
I shrug helplessly. If I tell him the truth—that I don't do love—he'll know that Connor and I aren't real. But if I don't tell him, isn't that just as bad as maintaining the lie?
"I decided that wouldn't ever be me," I say carefully. "I never want to need someone so badly that not having them destroys me. I can't do that."
His expression softens before he dips his head, brushing his lips across mine. "If you're trying to warn me off, I'm not going anywhere, princess."
Isn't that the problem? He isn't going anywhere, but I am. In ten days, I have to go back to Tennessee. All of this ends. And I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to be okay with that if I keep falling for him. I already feel like I need him too much, and that's dangerous. If I keep tripping down this path, it won't lead anywhere good. For either of us.
Maybe I shouldn't have come out here tonight.
"I should go," I murmur, disentangling myself from his arms.
He hops up gracefully, pulling me to my feet. For a long moment, he doesn't say anything. He just puts me back together, making sure my clothes are adjusted, and my hair is smoothed down. And then he tips my head back again, meeting my gaze.
