As the movie begins Caleb pulls the popcorn bowl from the table balancing it on our thighs between us.In a perfect world I can pretend we are on a date with how intimate everything is feeling right now.
Our thighs molded together, brushing our shoulders.I would only have to turn my head and lean forward just a little to capture his… Nope I need to derail this train right now because the last thing I need is a woody sitting right next to Caleb.I turn my focus to the movie a little more rigidly than is necessary to keep my mind in safer territory.
A short while into the movie I absently reach into the popcorn bowl only to collide with Caleb's hand.Automatically I turn my head to glance at him.His whiskey gaze locks on mine with an intensity I’ve never felt from him before.
Emotions I can't read are consuming me as I find myself slowly leaning…The sound from the TV blasts at max volume startling us both.I stand leaning forward and mash the volume down button, then sit back down.God I hope he didn't notice that I almost kissed him.
The rest of the movie I am aware of everything.Caleb softly laughing as he watches, every movement of his thigh against mine.Every brush of his arm, every shared breath in this tiny space.I try to focus on the animated rat chef, but my mind keeps circling back to that moment, to the heat in his eyes, to the fraction of a second where I thought maybe he was leaning in too.
When the credits finally roll, I feel both relieved and disappointed.My nerves are on edge but I don't want this moment to end yet.
"That was..."Caleb clears his throat, his voice lower than usual."That was exactly what I needed today.Thank you, Cole."
I start gathering the remnants of our disastrous lunch."It was nothing.Just a movie and some terrible sandwiches."
His hand catches mine as I reach for the popcorn bowl."No.It wasn't nothing."The warmth of his fingers sends electricity up my arm."You saw I was hurting and you did something about it.That means everything."His fingers linger on mine before he gently withdraws them, and the absence of his touch leaves my skin cold.I swallow hard, suddenly unable to meet his gaze.
“I just wanted to help.”I murmur.
"You always do, Cole.More than you know."I look at his sincere eyes and the room starts to shrink around us, charged with something I can't name.
I clear my throat, "Um..I should get this cleaned up," I say.Gesturing vaguely at the makeshift movie setup."Mason will want his TV back."Caleb nods, but makes no move to leave.Instead, he helps me pack up and clean.We work in tandem, silently moving around each other.
Once I have everything gathered and ready, I turn to Caleb.“Okay looks like I have everything, I’ll see you tomorrow.”He nods, but doesn't move toward the door.
"Cole," he starts, then stops, running a hand through his hair.The gesture is so uncharacteristically nervous that I turn to face him.
"Yeah?"I prompt when he doesn't continue.
"I..."His eyes meet mine, then dart away."I appreciate you.That's all."
"Anytime," I reply, smiling my stomach in knots.We both turn walking in opposite directions and I wonder if everything that happened today was just me or did he feel it too?
Nine
Caleb
Kiss The Boy - Keiynan Lonsdale
T
he thick and oppressive humid June air clings to my skin like a damp cloak.I gaze up at the dark storm clouds that seem to swallow up the sky, looming with the promise of a tumultuous downpour.I can’t shake the worry that it may escalate into an electrical storm as it so often does.
My mind immediately goes to the aging Church wiring, always finicky during storms and prone to causing power outages.I can already envision myself scrambling for backup notes, trying to salvage a lost sermon like I have done so many times in the past.Unfortunately, with our tight budget, replacing the old wiring has never been a practical option.
The church parking lot is nearly empty except, for Cole’s truck.As I walk up, I see him waiting for me with a cheerful smile as he has almost every morning for the last six months.“Good morning, boss man!”His voice rings out through the quiet lot as he walks towards me with his tool bag slung over his shoulder.
“Morning,” I respond with a smile, as he reaches me and we both turn walking towards the side entrance of the church.“What’s on the agenda for today?”I ask as we make our way inside, the sound of our footsteps echoing in the entryway.
“I’ll be working in the Chapel again, still researching the best wood for those damaged pews,” Cole replies, his brow furrowing.
“Well, I’ll be in my office if you need anything.See you at lunch?”I ask as he turns to walk off.
“You bet,” Cole turns back to me and shoots finger guns playfully before heading off towards the Chapel.I shake my head chuckling as I turn to head towards my office.
Sitting behind my desk I just grin to myself, I never realized until Cole how much more intimate having a male best friend was than a female best friend.With Ally there's a comfortable companionship.But with Cole it's different.It runs so much deeper, there's a connection I can't explain that feels like it's in my soul, I crave his company all the time.The weekends make me restless when he's not around, by Monday, seeing him is all I want.
I guess he makes me feel whole, like he’s this missing puzzle piece I have been waiting for.As a child I didn't have many friends, least of all male friends.
