“You can talk to Aron.” Driscoll bounced on the balls of his feet. “He’ll get the message to all the other leaders.”
“Yes,” Leoni said. “Enter his dreams.”
It made sense, but the thought of seeing Aron after how I’d betrayed him made my stomach curdle. Aron was the only friend I’d had, and I’d ruined it. But I wanted to get them off my back, so I just nodded.
“After I visit the prisoner. Tonight. I’ll enter his dreams and see him.”
Driscoll blew out a breath, and Leoni gave me a nod in return. She tugged at Driscoll’s arm. “Let’s go, then. We have some pixies to distract.”
Driscoll groaned. “Are we going to have to listen to Wesley sing? Because I don’t think I can handle another concert from them.”
Their voices disappeared as they walked down the staircase and rounded a corner, while I turned to face the curtain. Time to visit the prisoner and hopefully figure out what in the spirits below I was doing.
I mademy way down the stairs in the dark, this time knowing where the steps were so I didn’t trip again. Every time I had to touch the stone walls to steady myself, my hands prickled with heat. I’d been making decent progress on the first sweater, and while knitting hurt, it also gave my hands time to heal before I would have to start harvesting more nettle weed for the second sweater. The process was slow and laborious and made me feel like I’d be stuck in this castle for months before I finished. Maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing. More time to get answers.
I finally stepped down onto flat ground and slowly inched forward until I ran into the bars.
“You’re back again,” the woman said. “My silent visitor.”
I backed away from the bars, chains rattling and clinking as she shifted.
“I was hoping you’d come again,” she continued. “Your little visit the other day lifted my spirits quite a bit. I was thinkingabout what I might tell you if you came back, what I wanted you to know about me.”
I waited with bated breath. Would she tell me why she was imprisoned, perhaps? Or maybe she’d just tell me about her past, give me some clues as to who she was.
“I thought a lot about it. About my life. My regrets. My triumphs. Ultimately, I decided I wanted to tell you my most important story. I wanted to tell you a story about love.”
I stilled, not expecting that.
“Well, not just about love. About love and betrayal.” She paused. “I loved once. A good man. He was gentle and kind and nothing like anyone I’d ever met. He cared about others. He cared about me. And I ruined it. I had everything I could’ve ever wanted in this man, but I didn’t see it at the time. I didn’t appreciate him. I let others get into my head, others who decided he wasn’t good enough for me. I never thought he would leave. That was the irony of it all. I thought I was so perfect that he’d choose me no matter what.”
I couldn’t relate to that. I’d never thought I was perfect. Far from it. I wasn’t even sure I wanted love. Love felt too dangerous. It felt too risky. Everyone I loved left or died, and every time it happened, they took a piece of me with them. It wasn’t worth losing any more of myself.
So maybe I could relate to this woman’s story in some way. In her voice, through her words, I could hear the heartbreak. I didn’t know how long ago this man left her, but it was clear he’d hurt her.
“He didn’t choose me in the end,” she continued. “He betrayed me, you know. He trapped me, left me in the dark when he knew that was the one thing that could destroy my spirit. I hate the dark.”
That took the breath from my lungs. Was she talking about Kairoth? Was he the one who she loved, the one who betrayedher? The timeline didn’t quite make sense. Unless she was a shadow court resident whom he’d spared after his escaped his tomb. He fell in love with her, then spurned her.
The entire story made my mind spin. It was one thing to stop loving someone when they didn’t treat you how you deserved. It was entirely another thing to imprison them, torture them by trapping them in the worst possible place.
I’d never wanted to speak so badly. To ask if Kairoth was who she spoke of. I couldn’t imagine he’d be so cruel, but then again, what did I know about him? I’d had a few conversations with the god.
I swallowed back my questions, even though they sat on the tip of my tongue.
“I just want to see the sky,” she continued. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen anything other than darkness.”
The heartbreak in her voice wedged a splinter in my own heart. It probably wasn’t smart, but I reached my hand through the bars as far as I could. She couldn’t see me, so I didn’t really know what I expected to happen.
Suddenly, a cool soft hand gripped my hot, infected one. “Your hand.” She gasped. “What has happened to you? Did he hurt you?”
I snatched my hand away and turned to run. Kairoth hadn’t hurt me. He’d done the opposite so far. He’d taken care of me. But if this woman’s story was true, then everything I thought I knew about the god had been wrong. And for some reason, that felt like the biggest disappointment of all.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
YEAR 204, ERA OF THE GODS
Something is wrong. I feel it every day. It’s like my heart is slowly breaking. It started as a small crack the night I witnessed the poor woman’s death. Every day since, that crack has been spreading, and now I think my heart might be on the verge of shattering completely.
