Remnant's eyes fluttered open and pulled me back from the dark thoughts. Tears quickly filled her emerald depths and I felt her body begin to shake. Panic spread through our bond like the fire that consumed my mother in the death she had just experienced.
Short breaths, a thin veil of sweat, her heart thundering so loudly it reverberated in my head, the flush to her pale skin absent and replaced with a sickened pallor that I understood too well. I had hoped our bond and our truths would have set her free of her paralyzing panic attacks, but hope…goddess hope was a fucking bitch that never did a single damn thing for me or any of us. And because of that…the past still stalked us, a cruel haunting that would never go away.
Wrapping my arms around her, my hands swirled circles down her spine, catching through the salted tangles of her hair. "Breathe, little umbra, breathe."
"Emon," she sobbed, gripping onto me while I could hear her heart race uncontrollably, she was doing the opposite of breathing. "I can't…oh goddess I can't."
"Shhh." I rocked her, the bond twisting and tightening in my chest, making every inhale difficult to draw while I fully comprehended the source of her panic—the knowledge that our grim future could one day leave our daughter parentless. Waiting to see us walk on a horizon that would never come, abandoned and alone in this cruel fucked up world. "I know, little umbra. I know…"
I couldn't tell her it wouldn't happen. Fae could not lie and I fucking hated that about us. There were no words I could say to soothe the future’s grip on what was to come.
I stroked her hair and purred. This time letting her fall apart so that I could piece her back together, then put her back up on another fucking step only to watch her fall apart all over again. Fix and break, fix and break…it seemed that this would forever be our life's story but we would do it together and somewhere in those moments—love, joy, and laughter would be found.
No matter how fleeting.
Then on the whispering winds and the softly tossing seas, our daughter’s voice rang, in the most beautiful singsong sound I had ever heard. Crouching low, she touched her mother’s tear stained face.
"What do you do when the darkness comes?
Do you hide or do you run?
Nay neither!
What you need is the rising sun
Bringing forth the Shadow ones
Until the darkness comes undone.
Bearing a soul that has been won."
Remnant's heart slowed and her breathing eased while our daughter sang with her beautiful voice. If I had tears then, they would have fallen with pride. In this moment, I could easily see how she could be a queen. Beloved and cherished by all, with her cherub face and starlit crown, a deadly spear that eliminates souls clutched in her tiny hand, a pookah spirit guide resting on her shoulder, a powerful dragon scale swinging on her delicate neck, and somewhere on her person a conch shell whistle to summon an ancient sea king.
"Where did you learn that song?" I whispered, knowing it was one my mother sang to me many nights when she tucked me into bed as a boy.
She bit her lip. "The shadows told me to sing it to you." Looking at both of us, her tiny shoulders tensed with unease. Her bastard of a pookah hissed at us for causing her distress. "Did you not like it? Did I sing it wrong?"
Remnant shifted, sitting up, stretching her arms outwards for our daughter to climb into her lap. "No, my little chickadee. You sang it perfectly. You have a beautiful singing voice."
Dropping her spear on the step she lunged into Remnant’s arms, forcing the spirit guide to flash from existence from her shoulder before it reappeared again on the stone step, sleeping in a curled ball. I glared at the snoring nuisance—I could easily toss it in the sea.
As if hearing my thoughts a single red eye opened, his ear lowering and twitching in my direction.
I bared my fangs silently and watched as the damn thing smiled before closing its eyes again.
Fucking asshole.
Remnant exhaled shakily, tucking Riella in closer, and watching as the shadows nestled in our daughter’s lap like a slumbering kitten just like the umbras of old used to do with me.
Thunder rolled across the sky and Remnant watched it lost in thought, "Emon…there is something I need to tell you…about your mother’s death."
I knew what she was about to say. "You need not relive this, little umbra. Riley has told me his version and while it had been difficult to hear and I wanted to rage at him for not saving her, his life would have been forfeit too. He gave her kindness and mercy and for that I will forever be in his debt."
My soulmate shook her head, resistance to my acceptance easy to see. "I knew Deirdre was unhinged…I knew she sent me away for a reason. I just wanted to believe…" Remnant scowled and shook her head, "no that’s all an excuse. I knew Emon. Part of me knew that she was evil and Iallowedit."
I tilted her chin up to me, our daughter’s big eyes watching our exchange with quiet astuteness. "I have had much time to come to terms with my mother's death, little umbra. And there was a time where I wanted to blame you for it, using it as a reason to go to war against Faerie, especially when you rallied armies against us. I thought surely, the daughter of the shadow fae leader would follow in her mother’s footsteps and honor the old alliance between our families once again. But you did not," I admitted softly, watching the winds pick up and the watery seas rise—Wrath's reprieve waning.
Remnant flinched, her eyes defeated.
