Tanner paces for a few seconds in a bid to calm himself down. “How the hell I didn’t punch him in the face will be anyone’s guess.”
“Trust me, I wanted to knock his block off, too. No one deserves that kind of treatment, especially Jade. I wish we’d methim some other time, not here the night before your wedding. Then you might have gotten a swipe at him, after me, that is.”
He stops pacing and blows out a breath. “Thanks, man.”
“For what?”
“For having my back. You always do.”
I kick the ground with my foot, guilt washing over me again in waves. I don’t know how much longer I’m going to keep this up. But if I blurt everything out now, he might just knock my block off. “We’re best friends,” I say. “You’d do the same for me.”
“That’s true. Always.” He sighs and glances up, looking me square in the eye. His mouth parts like he’s going to say something, then he hesitates. I feel a thrum deep in my chest from the stretch of silence between us that neither of us rushes to fill. “So, you were gonna say something to me before Aaron showed up?”
Oh, fuck, he remembers that with all the commotion. “Yes,” I sigh. “But I don’t know if I should right now.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t want you to be pissed.”
There’s a long pause between us. Tanner folds his arms across his chest and lets out another breath. “How long has it been going on?” he finally asks.
A stiffness tightens my body like he’s struck me with a sharp object. My back straightening like a metal rod. “What?” Our eyes still lock as Tanner leans back on the stone wall, his arms still folded.
“You heard me.”
“How long has what?—”
“The jig is up,” Tanner says with a sigh. “You and Jade.”
I stare now, open-mouthed, eyes wide, which I’m sure are bulging out of my head. He knows?
“How did you?—”
“Come on, what kind of fool do you take me for?”
I drag my hand through my hair and start to pace up and down myself now. “Fuck, Tanner. I’m not gonna be an even bigger dickhead and try to deny it. That’s what I wanted to say before, when the LA guys walked up. I’ve been wanting to tell you.”
Tanner nods, pursing his lips while he thinks. That’s worse in some respects, because he’s thinking about his reaction. At least he hasn’t punched me yet, that’s gotta be a bonus. “You were gonna tell me?” he eventually asks.
“Yeah. However inappropriate timing it is, I was gonna tell you. How did you know about us?”
“I didn’t. I just suspected. Deb mentioned how good you guys look together and how happy Jade seems since she returned from Seattle. At first I thought she was crazy, but I think Jade has always held a torch for you.”
“I think I may have always held a torch for her, too.”
Tanner lets out a breath, and I risk a glance up at him from my shoes. He looks me dead in the eye again.
“I really wish you guys had told me.”
“I’m so fucking sorry. This is honestly brand new,” I quickly say. “Nothing was going on in Seattle, I fucking swear to God.” I don’t think the bar thing counts a few months back as neither of us realized at the time who each other was, that’s what I’m going with, anyway. “Jade wanted to wait until after the wedding.”
He runs a hand through his hair now. It seems our news has taken the heat off his reaction to Aaron, at least. “I can’t believe it.”
“We never meant it to happen,” I admit. “And in all truth, Tan. I’m struggling with myself at the moment, I want to be the guy who’s good enough for her. I’d never hurt her, but you know how I grew up. My mom fucked me up good and proper. It’s made it hard for me to form adult relationships. Growing up like that was no picnic.”
“I get shit happened,” he says. “I really do. But I believe you are good for her, Jay. When I can see past my best friend and my little sister together, I guess I can see it objectively. Just don’t hurt her. Then we’re gonna have a big fucking issue.”
“I would never,” I say. “My careless wild ways are over. They were over the minute I realized I had feelings for her.”
