Breakfast alfresco is a quiet affair, with me, Jay, my parents, Luca, Deb, Tanner and Robbie. Deb’s parents, Josie and Colin, join us part way through and more wedding prep discussions get under way. Jay managed to save me a seat next to him, as luck would have it, but it’s on the edge of the booth and his leg is partly in the way. I literally have to squish next to him with our legs touching under the table. I know he could move it, his sexy little quirk of a smile tells me so, but he chooses to keep it pressed up hard against mine. And no one is the wiser for it.
Robbie lays under the table on his belly, in his usual position, waiting for any leftovers to drop. I don’t miss the way Jay and Tanner both sneak him some bacon when they think no one is looking. Just like they did when they were kids.
My mind casts back to that time. It seems so long ago. Everyone knew Jay was the best hockey player our district had ever seen, but who knew he’d be here now, one of the most loved center players in the NHL. My heart swells with pride for him, especially coming from the background he did.
I remember the day he was leaving for North Dakota. We all knew it was for the best for him to pursue his hockey career with a position with the USHL in Fargo. He also got to live with his beloved Grandpa and see his uncle way more often than he had in those last few years. It was a bitter-sweet day the day he left.
“You all have been like the family I never had,” Jay said when he picked up his ruck-sack and slung it over his shoulder, ready to be on his way. “I’ll never forget it.”
“You better not forget about us.” Mom was teary and sniveled into her handkerchief, she’d been a mess all morning.
“Yes, we want postcards from every port when you make it into the NHL,” my dad said, looking ever the part of a reluctant to let him go but doting foster-dad. That’s what my parents had become to him over the remainder of the school term. Jay said it himself.
His mom came around once to try and convince Jay to come back, but my mom threatened to call child protective services. After what she’d put Jay through, my parents wanted to see Jay thrive, not be dragged down again by his own mother.
Jay begged my mom to let it go and not get authorities involved. He didn’t want to go into the system at this crucial stage of his life. Not with him starting a new chapter again, back where he more or less started. He was turning eighteensoon, anyway, so there’s really nothing his mother could have done.
I heard she took off with her boyfriend shortly after; I don’t know what happened after that.
“I’ll be sure to send postcards,” Jay promised, he’d been quiet all morning when he’d packed his things. Every possession he owned fit into a duffel bag and one ruck-sack.
Tanner reached forward and gave Jay the longest bro hug I’d ever seen. “Look after yourself, Man.” I’d never seen Tanner look so upset, the edges of tears forming at the rims of his eyes. I wasn’t sure if they were going to spill over or not.
“I will.” Jay patted him hard on the back in the way men do. His eyes landed on mine over Tanner’s shoulder. We were all standing in the hallway, Dad ready to drive Jay to the airport, where he’d grab a bus for the last leg out to his grandfather’s place.
I would never be able to forget the look he gave me that day, trepidation in his eyes, a solemn, heartfelt smile, like this was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do. And I knew that was impossible, he’d been through way harder things than this. Casting my mind back to the night of the storm made me realize that. I still didn’t know the extent of what happened that night, and maybe I’d never know.
He mouthed a ‘thank you,’ toward me and I mashed my lips together as my gaze dropped to the ground. Tears pricked at my eyes, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold it in like Tanner was.
It was only when Jay reached out to give me a hug, his long arms wrapping around me and holding me tight, that I cracked like an eggshell that’s been dropped on the floor. A million little pieces left in tatters. I was going to miss him so much. All those study sessions, all the times he’d made me laugh and not make me feel like a nuisance.
“Make us all proud,” I managed to garble out, a loose tear rolling from one eye, closely followed by a second from my other. They continued to roll down my face towards his shirt, leaving a splotchy imprint on the material on his shoulder. “I’m sure it won’t be hard for you to do.”
“I’ll try,” he whispered. “Look after yourself, Little J.”
They were the last words he spoke to me before he left. After we broke from our embrace, Jay reached down to pat Robbie, rubbing his face into his fur. It was only then that I saw he was crying too, but it was a silent shedding of tears that no one could hear, mopped up by our dog’s fur. “I’m gonna miss you too, Robbie dog.”
We part ways after breakfast after light banter about the wedding and Jay’s game tonight, without too much ado. Deb, our moms, and her friends have yoga and the spa day with lunch to attend to and it’s a nice distraction for a few hours with everything that has gone on so far. I manage a quick call to Beth in the afternoon before I’m getting ready for the game tonight, where I get a few things off my chest.
I give her some juicy details, but there’s some things I keep for myself because I’m kinda embarrassed to say them out loud. I still can’t believe where he had his head last night, doing things I never thought possible. He got me off so damned quickly, and he was definitely pleased with himself. Talk about sex god.
But the ultimate end to the perfect day, even after having a massage, facial and pedicure at the hotel spa, is seeing Jay skate out onto the ice.
I’ve been excited all day about seeing him play tonight. I loved the game I went to in Seattle, and hockey has become somewhat of a favorite over the past few months.
He’s so freaking phenomenal, and hot as all hell in his hockey get up.
Jay managed to get us amazing seats right behind the players’ box, and I spot Emmerson and Cindy when we’re about to take our seats. I knew there was a chance I’d see Cindy because she works for the team. She often travels with them even though she works in administration and not directly in the team. But it doesn’t stop her from traveling when she can. Her sister looks after their little Frenchie, Henry, when they’re away. She loves coming to the games and Tyler always makes it known he’s her guy when he skates by and even slides up to the barrier before the game to blow her a kiss.
We have a quick group hug and a giggle over Tyler’s affectionate display. Taylor isn’t much better, he’s warming up with some fancy footwork right in front of where we’re about to sit. His attention is set on his gorgeous redhead.
“These two are too much!” I laugh. “Talk about smitten.”
“I don’t think they’re the only ones.” Cindy smiles, giving me a little conspirative wink.
“Jay hasn’t taken his eyes off you,” Em agrees, tucking a strand of her long hair behind her ear and nodding over to the side in a single sweep of her head.
I glance down at the ice and sure enough, sapphire blue eyes are on me. Jay casts the cutest wave ever and I wave back, feeling the giddiness in my chest and more butterflies erupting in my belly. The promise of another night with him tonight when this is over has me just about exploding. “It’s been an intense weekend so far,” I admit with a shaky breath. That is the biggest understatement of the year.
