Me:Sorry, lover boy, I have a hot date here tonight.
“Smile, girls,” I say and snap a picture before I send it off to him.
I’m not ignoring Eden’s comment, although from the shrug she’s giving me, I’m sure she feels like I am. But the past is the past. I’m not ready to tell it. There is nothing I can do to change it, and she knows that. It’s how I became the person I am today, and without it, who knows where I would be.
Probably buried six feet under.
The thought sends a shiver down my spine, and I rub the faded scar on my left wrist absentmindedly.
“We’re supposed to be having fun tonight, so stop looking like someone kicked your puppy. Finish packing and then we can pop in a movie,” Everleigh chimes in, taking my wrist in her hand to stop the movement.
I shake my head to rid the dark thoughts that are there. She’s right. Tonight is for happy memories, not memories I’d rather forget.
* * *
I slideinto Ethan’s car, and he hands me a paper cup of coffee. I take a sip of the warm drink and close my eyes, gripping the cup between my hands.Heaven.As he places his hand on my thigh, I look over at him, and he pulls out onto the road to the freeway to take us to the airport.
“Morning, beautiful,” he says.
A contented sigh leaves my lips. “Good morning, handsome.”
“Sleep well?”
Not particularly.I tossed and turned for a lot of the night, worried that something was going to go wrong or that he would decide he didn’t want to come after all. I shouldn’t be this worried about showing himthispart of my life. This part isn’t as messy as other parts, but it doesn’t make it easier.
Ethan is getting a piece of me no one else ever has. That’s a big step.
“Fine, just nervous for the trip. You?”
He rubs circles on my thigh, and I scoot down lower, sinking into the expensive leather seats. “There’s nothing to be nervous about. If I didn’t want to be here, I wouldn’t be. I want to see this part of you—the life you had to leave behind. Maybe it will help me understand a bit more about you and some of the secrets you keep.”
All my muscles go rigid.What does he mean by that? What does he know that he’s not telling me?I start running through any and all conversations I’ve had with him, or the ones I can remember anyway. Was there something I’ve said to make him feel I’m keeping secrets?
Well, you are, dummy.
My entire adult life has been one secret to the next. The lines of truth get blurred from time to time, and there have been moments I’ve gotten lost in what is real and what’s fake. I take a sip of my coffee to distract myself. This is not how I anticipated the drive to the airport would be. He’s trusted me with some of his secrets and has let me into his life.
Shouldn’t I be willing to do the same for him?
Chapter 26
Ethan
Addison has barely said two words to me since we left her apartment. I figured it was nerves and that by the time we landed she would be telling me about her hometown, but the most I’ve gotten out of her is an address to a flower shop.
I glance at her, but she’s looking out the passenger window, ignoring me—pulling away. I knew this would be hard for her, especially when I sprung the idea on her, but she can’t shut me out.
“Addy, will you tell me what you’re thinking?” I ask, breaking the silence.
“Nothing,” she replies instantly.
“Please, babe. It’s not nothing. Are you thinking about your family?” I reach over the console to stroke her leg, anything to get her to open up to me.
“Yes.” She doesn’t offer me anything else for a few minutes but then opens up again. “You know my past isn’t the greatest, right? It was until my family died, but after that, things went downhill.”
I don’t know much about her past, but this is a start.“I know you worked at the strip club, and probably had to do some things you aren’t proud of. It’s the past, though. I’m willing to look past what you had to do to survive. You’re not in the same place you were all those years ago. You’ve grown up, changed.” I glance between her and the road, looking for any type of acknowledgment. “You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. You did what you had to.”
“What if I’ve done some things I didn’t have to butwantedto?” It comes out so quiet, I almost don’t catch it all.
