I dress quickly, hoping to meet her outside. I spot her with Holden, holding a steaming cup against her lips, blowing on it to cool it down. I grab a bowl of oatmeal, a banana, and a bottle of water to intercept their conversation. As I get closer, I can hear her talking quietly, so I slow my pace, hoping to hear something juicy.
“I can’t believe he would do that to me.” She sighs and rubs her forehead. “I need to start over, forget about the past.”
My heart sinks. Too much time has passed between us. I really thought she was warming up to me, that today we could sit down and have a real heart to heart talk, and I could finally apologize for being the asshole I was to her. Make her see I’m not like that. Let her see me as she saw me when we were naive kids.
Fuck.
“Hey, Tristan,” Holden says.
Lana whips her head around to look at me and winces in pain. She must have a massive hangover today. I hold the water out for her, and she takes it. A quiet thank you passes between us before the awkwardness sets in.
Holden starts to slowly back away, and the sheer look of panic on her face makes me stop him.
“No. Stay, Holden. I’m going to go check things at the barn. Wanted to make sure Lana was feeling okay.” I look at her. “Make sure you drink lots of water and eat a banana. It should help with the hangover. Let’s meet after lunch, and you can show me the new designs.”
She nods. “Okay.”
I leave the two of them alone, put my full plate in with the dirty dishes since I’ve lost my appetite, and sulk all the way to the barn. God, I really am such an idiot! There’s nothing I need to do here. Billy has everything under control, and no one needs a guide today. I think it would be best if I head home for a bit. Mom and Dad have things taken care of here. They would be fine for a few hours.
What am I going to do at home? Nothing. I’m going to sulk there, too. I scrub my hands down my face and sigh. I decide to saddle up Gage and go for a ride. Riding has always calmed me and centered me. There is a quiet knock on the barn wall, and I spin to find Lana standing there.
“Hey.” She wiggles her fingers at me.
“Hey.” I turn back around and finish securing the saddle to his back. I’m not sure I can handle looking at her right now. Not after I know she wants to forget me.
“I, um,” she pushes out a harsh breath, “I wanted to say thank you for last night. For making sure I was safe.”
“Yeah, no problem.” I grab Gage’s reins and lead him past Lana and out of the barn before hopping on his back and riding away like a coward.
* * *
Her designs are perfect. She’s factored in everything I wanted for the new cabins, just like I knew she would. Lana definitely has a knack for design, and I couldn’t be prouder of her. I made myself scarce for the rest of the afternoon. I told her I would be in touch with the office about getting copies of the finished blueprints for the builders.
“You know, our company also does interior designing. When the cabins are built, if you need someone, I’m just a phone call away,” she says, her voice sweet.
“Yeah. Great. Thanks. I’ll call the office if I’m in need of your company’s services.” I poke at one of the logs in the fire, keeping my eyes glued to the embers that crackle free from the burning wood and float into the sky.
She sighs and stands in defeat. “Goodnight, Tristan. It was great to see you again. I hope everything works out for you.”
I watch her retreating form and lean back in my chair. How did I fuck this up again? I try to think about what I did that could have been so bad. Okay, so barging into her bathroom while she was showering wasn’t my finest moment, nor was staying with her after the bar. Each time, though, she was willing. She wanted me just as much as I wanted her.
Maybe Holden has some insight for me. The two of them have been very close since she arrived. He’s gone home for the night, and I figure it’s best to wait until morning to talk to him. Dad is sitting by the fire, and I stand and stretch.
“I’m going to head home for the night. See ya in the morning, Dad.” He waves to me, and I head home.
Someone pounding on my front door pulls me from my restless sleep. I need to start taking something for this shit. I pad down the hall in nothing but my boxers and pull the door wide open.
“You’re a fucking idiot; you know that?” Holden asks as he shoulders past me into my living room.
“Please, do come in,” I mumble, closing the door behind him. “Why am I a fucking idiot?”
“You brushed Lana off all day yesterday, and then, you didn’t even get your happy ass to the ranch to say goodbye to her this morning. She was devastated when I dropped her off at the airport. I tried calling and texting you, but you didn’t answer,” he seethes. “You bitched and moaned about fixing things since she arrived, and then pull this shit.”
“Not like she wanted to see me anyway. She couldn’t believe how I acted and couldn’t wait to put her past behind her. Sound familiar?” I cross my arms over my chest, facing him straight on.
He snorts and sneers at me again. “Yeah, sounds like she was talking about that prick, Russ.”
My stomach flips, and my eyes widen to the size of saucers. “W-what?”
