I shook my head, “Only half a life.”He squeezed my hand, and I knew he understood my meaning.I took him inside and showed him all around our house, told him about Dylan and our life and how we got here.“I never moved on, I tried, but I couldn’t.”I told him, sitting down in the living room.He moved one of the throw pillows so there was nothing between us and I laid my head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around me, tucking me in.It was like he had never been gone, like this is how we spend every afternoon together, relaxing on our day off.
“Neither did I.”he said, sighing against my hair.“I need to tell you what happened.It’s hard to get through it all, but I need to tell you everything because I’ve been holding it in for way too long.”He starts then stops again, and I turn my head so I can see his face.“Did you ever read my letters?”he asks.
“Yes.”I nod, “All of them, a hundred times.And I saved them.”Then I turn so my whole body is facing him, “There’s a song…” I didn’t finish before he started smiling.
“You heard it?”
“As soon as I heard it, I ran back to your letters because I knew there was one that sounded just like the song.I read that one over and over again.I knew it had to be you; I knew it.Carrie and Dylan and I started looking for you after that.”
“He knows?”his eyes are wide, and I smile.
“He thinks he saw you the other night.”I tell him.
“He did.I did.When you showed me his picture, I knew it was him that I saw.Carrie is his girlfriend?”I nod.“I watched them, they reminded me so much of us.God, I missed too much.He’ll hate me for not being in his life.”
“No.No, he won’t.”I squeezed his knee.“He wishes for you every year on his birthday, hoping that he’ll magically get to see you one day.This is going to beeverythinghe’s wanted.”
A few seconds later, his smile started to fade, and he asked, “Are you ready to hear everything that happened now?”I nod and Lee lays out all the details that made us question his death.He tells me about his self-destruction andBig Bossand the fake name.He tells me he’s only seventeen years into his twenty year protection order and that was why he never tried to find me or his parents.He tells me about his secret Wednesday night meetups with Dane and Liz and how they try to find me every year.
“You really need to update your business website.”He tells me, laughing.“And why aren’t you on any of the social media sites?”
“I don’t like being in the public eye.I like our privacy in our quiet little town.”He nods and says he can see that, and he knew as soon as he saw the town square that of all places, this was where he would find me.
I put my hands over my face and shake my head,I still can’t believe this is real.“Pinch me.”
“What?!”
“Pinch me!”I tell him again.
“I’m not pinching you.”He laughs.
“Pinch me so I know I’m not dreaming!”He reaches over and pinches my ass.“Not what I meant!”I slap at his arm.
“You’re not dreaming, Ellie.”He says, leaning in so his face is almost touching mine.Hot bolts of electricity race through my body and I suck in a breath.I feel like I’m sixteen again, aching for him to touch me.“Where’s your bed?”he whispers into my ear.
With his hand in mine, I lead him upstairs and into the master bedroom where he wastes no time in throwing his coveralls off.I grab at his t-shirt and yank it up, feeling the warmth of his skin and my lips touch his neck while he fumbles with his belt and steps out of his pants.He pulls my dress up and breaks our kiss as the fabric passes between us.Then we’re left, nearly naked and panting, his eyes taking me in and resting on the scar just below my navel.His fingers trace over it, sending shivers down my legs before he pulls my panties down.He’s back at my neck again, the roughness of his stubble scraping against my skin as he unlatches my bra, taking away the last piece of clothing that separates his body from mine and his mouth falls to my breasts, the heat of his tongue cascading me into fits of urgency.I pull him up to me and take his face in my hands, kissing him deep with desire.He pulls back, looking into my eyes, and my entire body is buzzing.
I don’t know how we end up in my bed, but we’re here and he’s on top of me, a knee spreads my legs and I wrap them around him.
“I want you right now.”He tells me, his jaw clenched.“Tell me you want this.”
“Please?”it comes out as a question and I let out a quiet hum, feeling his hands grip my hips.I arch my back, my body begging him, and I bite my lip, trying to hold back my eagerness.His lips press against mine just as he thrusts into me; my moans desperate and silenced by his tongue.
He took me by surprise; the younger memory of him fading while this new, older, more muscular version of him brought flutters of butterflies through every inch of me.His biceps swelled, holding his torso up as he looked down on me, that smirk across his face, telling me he remembers all the secrets of my body.
I couldn’t hold back anymore when the pressure of him against me created a friction that burst into flames inside me and he slowed his thrusts, bringing me down in waves of tortuous pleasure.He winds down, easing in and out of me until he trembles with his own release.
We fall apart all over again before falling asleep, slick with sweat; the comforter lost to the floor and the sheets tangled between us.
Chapter Forty-One
DYLAN
Present Day
It’s early and I come home to a light summer rain that drizzles the leaves of my favorite maple tree in the front yard.It was the first thing we planted after buying the house, before we even started the renovations.Mom wanted the tree to grow with me and we measured my height every year next to it.It outgrew me pretty quickly, but we still take my first day of school picture under the branches.The memory makes me smile until I pull forward and notice a car in the driveway that I’ve never seen before.I frown,Mom never brings people home that I don’t know.
I walk inside, calling out to Mom, but there’s no answer.I take the stairs two at a time and peek into her room to tell her that I’m home and I shield my eyes, closing the door just as quick.Holy Shit!Someone was in bed with her.I did not want to see that.But it’s too late, Mom heard me, and I can hear her shuffling to get the covers up.
