“Are you not hungry then?” he questioned. “Would you wish to go home early?”
“No!” she said hastily. And a little too loudly, she realised, when a few heads turned in her direction. She pointedly ignored the person sitting directly across from her, even as a prickly sensation raced over her skin.
They were all seated at a grand table in the dining room and, despite her best wishes, she had not been seated next to the Duke of Ryewood. Instead, he was sitting right across from her.
She tried her best not to look at him and so far, she succeeded. But he was the only thing she could focus on. Ever since she saw him dancing with the beautiful, blond lady, her hope had begun to wither. And now that he was seated betweentwobeautiful blond ladies, that hope was a dead thing in the centre of her chest.
On a brighter note, she had now gathered that the blond-haired lady on his left was his sister. Elaine overheard hercall him ‘brother’ and she did notice a few similarities in their features. That didn’t make her feel much better, however, since his attention was almost entirely monopolised by the marquess’ daughter.
“I noticed you dancing with a few gentlemen,” James queried once more, “Do any of them pique your interest?”
Elaine flushed, eyes pinned to her still rather full plate. “Do you genuinely believe this is a suitable conversation to engage in during such a public dinner, James?”
“Why not? If you tell me who you fancy, I may be able to have a talk with them.”
“And why would you want to have a talk with them?”
“To see if they are up to par, of course,” he said as if it should have been obvious.
Elaine sighed. She appreciated James’ dedication to her cause but right now, it wasn’t helping her feel any better. “Tomorrow we shall see if there is any hope left for me,” she said, hoping she didn’t sound as morose as she felt. “For now, I simply want this evening to be over with.”
“Why? You were in a grand mood a short while ago.”
That was before she began comparing herself to the beautiful daughter of Lord Grovington. That was before she saw the duke dancing with her and realising that she could not have been as elegant as her. That was before she was seated across from the duke and Lady Isabella, forced to catch snippets of their conversations even though she was making an active effort to not listen.
“James?”
“Yes?”
“Have you ever had feelings for another person?”
James’s hand faltered midway to his mouth, his fork growing limp between his fingers. For a moment, he didn’t move, staring dead ahead. Elaine frowned, following his gaze. Ifshe didn’t know any better, she would think he was looking at the duke’s sister.
“I have,” he said at last. “But they were fleeting emotions in my past. I have not felt anything close to love if that is what you are truly asking.”
“It would surpass anything I have ever experienced. Can you tell me what it is like?”
James frowned. He seemed to be thinking about it for a moment. “It is…most distracting.”
“How so?”
“You find that you are unable to focus on the things that you should. The person you fancy consumes your thoughts. When they walk into a room, they are all you can focus on. If they are not by your side, the distance between you feels as vast as the ocean. It is…simply distracting.” He resumed his eating. “It is a useless emotion.”
Distracting. James was no poet yet he managed to encapsulate all that she felt in a single word.
Elaine glanced at the duke. Her heart skipped a beat when she realised he was already staring at her. Lady Isabella was saying something to him but he wasn’t paying her any mind. When their eyes met, he tilted his head to the side and smiled.
Elaine’s heart thundered against her chest. Blushing furiously, she looked away quickly, then chastised herself for acting so immaturely.
“Do you not wish to marry, James?” she asked her cousin, trying to act normal despite the fact the duke had sent her nerves into a flurry once more.
“I do. It is my duty as a viscount.”
“For reasons other than duty,” she pressed.
“No. Marriage is simply a mutually beneficial relationship between a man and a woman. If I had no duty to provide anheir for the title, then there would be no benefit for me in the relationship.”
“Surely there are other gains to be had between a husband and his wife.”
