“Really?” Georgina rested her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes at her brother. “Because it seems like you are preoccupied with more than the flowers, Philip. Is everything quite alright?”
Philip immediately shook his head. He did not want to discuss this with Georgina now. The last thing he needed was anything else to stir up these feelings cascading through him. The conflict of emotions was just too much.
He needed to forget about his encounter. At least for the time being.
“I am quite fine, Georgina. Thank you very much. Just lost in thought, which is all. Do you think perhaps we should leave now?”
He needed to get out of these gardens. He had to escape the strangeness of the experience that he’d just had with Lady Verity. Thankfully, Georgina seemed to agree with him. They all made their way out of the gardens and headed to the carriage.
Georgina and Adelaide talked incessantly all the way back home, giving Philip some much needed time to gaze out the window and to let his mind wander. Because he truly did have a lot to think about.
Lady Rosalind Fitzwilliam had not been far from his mind, because his mother would not allow him to forget about her for even a second. If she spotted him deep in thought for even a moment, she used that time to remind him of all her wonderful qualities and why she would make the perfect bride for him. ButPhilip did not feel a thing when he was near her. Nor did he find it easy to have a conversation with her, it seemed that they had absolutely nothing in common.
Meeting Lady Verity and finding her company so wonderfully pleasant had only made it starkly obvious that he was never going to feel that sort of connection with the debutante. Their talk about art and the way that she smiled at him… he simply felt at ease in her company. That might have been their first meeting, but that did not make it awkward.
Even as she stumbled and fell, she was sweet and graceful about it.
Perhaps it was the artist in her.
It did not help that he knew Lady Verity was someone that Julianna would have loved. She would have enjoyed her intelligence and embraced her authenticity, befriending her easily and likely going on to spend a lot of time with her.
Lady Rosalind she would have likely had a lot of trouble with. She would not have enjoyed talking to someone who only seemed to care about superficial things and the gossip of the ton.
In fact, he was sure that Julianna would not have been impressed with any of the so called suitable young ladies that his mother had found for him.
She would have been horrified by the list and the way that his mother was behaving.
Julianna had told him that he needed to find love again when she realized that she wasn’t going to survive her illness. She insisted that she did not wish for him to be lonely forever, but the thought of courting absolutely filled him with dread. It did not matter what Julianna had said, he couldn’t envision himself being unfaithful to her memory.
He sighed to himself, knowing that at some point he was going to have to talk to his mother again about this. He needed to find the right words to make her understand that he did notwant to put himself back on the marriage mart. She might have been worried about him producing an heir to inherit the title and the estate, but if he did not, Georgina could still do so.
Things did not have to end with him.
As the carriage rolled along the cobble stone streets, Philip’s thoughts remained stubbornly fixed on Lady Verity Sinclair. He replayed their brief encounter in his mind, analyzing every word and gesture, searching for clues to explain the powerful impact she had on him. He tried to dismiss it as a fleeting fancy, a mere distraction from the weight of his responsibilities, but the depth of his reaction suggested otherwise.
Upon their arrival home, Philip was grateful to escape to his study. He needed solitude to sort through the jumble of emotions and thoughts.
Settling in to his leather arm chair, he allowed his gaze to drift to the window, where the fading light of the day cast long shadows across the garden outside.
His mind wandered to Lady Verity once more, to the way her eyes lit up when she spoke about her art, and the genuine passion in her voice. She was a stark contrast to the shallow, insipid conversations he usually endured at society events. Verity was different… refreshingly so. Her authenticity had stirred something deep within him, a longing for a connection that he had believed was forever lost.
Julianna had been the love of his life, and her loss had left a gaping void in his heart. She had urged him to find happiness again, to not let his life be defined by her absence. But how could he? The thought of opening his heart to another had seemed impossible until now.
Yet, the unexpected encounter with Lady Verity had planted a seed of possibility.
***
Knock, knock.
Philip wasn’t expecting any guests, so the knock at his door surprised him.
He glanced up from his work to see his butler smiling at him. “You have a visitor… Lord Thomas Grayson.”
Of course, Jameson knew that this was going to put a smile on Philip’s face. It had been a long time since he was able to see his friend, ever since he went traveling abroad.
“Send him in.” He said, just as Thomas, ever the impatient one, sauntered into the room on his own.
“Philip, how are you?”
