“You were quite right to do so.” Taking his mother’s hand, he pressed it gently as an unfamiliar sensation – though not unwelcome – began to wind through him. “I am sorry. Ihavebeen clinging to this shade, this name which thetonhave spoken of me. You are quite right in that regard. I have thought my own company to be the very best of company. I have thought to stay away from society because I simply did not wish to go amongst them. I have clung to my regret and my sorrow over what happened to my brother, whatIdid to my brother, for many a year.”
“But you have no need to cling to it.”
Hearing his brother’s voice, Nathanial turned sharply, seeing William walking towards him, his limp barely noticeable now.
“I have told you such a thing already and still, you are determined to linger in this.” William stopped by them both, his eyebrows lifting. “Why are you so determined?”
Nathanial shook his head. “It does not matter why. What matters now is that, having listened to both of you, I have decided to set aside the mantle which I have long carried. Indeed, my initial thought was that I would return to my estate very soon upon my arrival in London but now, I have set upon staying a little longer.”
Lady Ashbourne pressed his fingers back in return. “That is good, Ashbourne. You should learn how to move about society again. And society needs to see that you are not what they think you are.”
“Alas, I think they may be wrong in that regard.” Nathanial offered his mother a wry smile. “I have been beastly in my dark demeanour, in my unwillingness to join society and to reject all kind invitations and the like. However, I have looked at my life and my behaviour and have chosen to alter myself, where I can.”
Both his mother’s and William’s eyes rounded at once and Nathanial’s stomach twisted sharply. Was that truly coming to him as such a surprise?
“I already apologised to Lady Amelia for the blunt manner with which I spoke to her last evening,” he continued, dropping his gaze to the floor. “And I will continue to apologise if I must, to whomever I injure or upset in my manner as I learn what it is to be a better, happier fellow.”
A short silence met his words and Nathanial glanced from one to the other, suddenly a little concerned that what he had said would be either laughed at or ignored, as though he would not be able to do such a thing. Instead, his brother gave him a friendly tap on the shoulder and when he looked into his mother’s eyes he saw that Lady Ashbourne was blinking rapidly as though she were pushing her tears away.
“That is wonderful to hear, my son.” Her voice grew hoarse and she squeezed his fingers again. “Come now, let us make ourway to the ball.” With a breath, she smiled at him, her eyes still a little glassy. “How thrilled I am to hear it, Nathanial. Truly.”
It was not often that his mother called him by his Christian name and Nathanial felt the weight of it settle on his heart. When she turned to walk to the carriage, William following after her, Nathanial paused for a moment, aware of the tension clawing through his stomach. Yes, he had determined to change his ways and yes, he had Lady Amelia’s very kind offer to guide him through such things but all the same, a strange tension lingered within him.
He could only pray that this evening would yield some profitable results.
***
“Good evening, Lady Katherine, Lady Goodfellow.” Nathanial inclined his head, seeing how mother and daughter exchanged a glance. “I do hope that you are enjoying your time in London?”
Again, there came another quick glance though it was Lady Goodfellow who spoke rather than her daughter. “Yes, Your Grace. How very good of you to ask.” She offered him a quick smile and then looked to her daughter, her eyes rounding as she urged her silently and yet clearly enough, to speak to the Duke thereafter.
“It has been very pleasant.”
Lady Katherine’s voice was more like a squeak, her gaze darting all over the place as she sought to find a place to settle her eyes. Evidently, she was a little uncertain about looking at him directly and Nathanial frowned, only then to pull that from his features, realizing it would make him appear displeased.
“And have you been to many balls?” Trying to find something to say, something to ask to a young lady who appeared to be more than a little terrified of speaking to him wasvery difficult indeed. Nathanial attempted to keep his expression as banal as he could, struggling to offer her a smile given the frustrating way she began to stammer and stutter, making the conversation all the more difficult.
“Thi…this is… this is my… my… ”
“Ah, good evening, Lady Katherine, Lady Goodfellow. How very good to see you both. I am sure you both remember my sister, Lady Charlotte?”
Nathanial let out a slow breath, relief filling him as he looked into Lady Amelia’s eyes for a moment, only to catch the way that Lady Katherine let out a great rush of breath, clearly more than a little relieved that her conversation with him had been so interrupted.
“Good evening, Lady Charlotte, Lady Amelia.” Lady Goodfellow smiled and then gestured to Nathanial, though her smile flickered a little. “We were just speaking to the Duke of Ashbourne, who was asking Katherine if she had been attending many balls of late.”
Lady Amelia smiled warmly at the young lady. “This is only my second ball, Lady Katherine. Have you been to more than I?”
“Yes, though not too many. This is my seventh ball of the Season and they are all more than a little enjoyable! Indeed, I find it very difficult to say which one I enjoyed the most!”
“I am sure that will continue, the more balls you attend,” Nathanial interjected, catching the uncertainty flickering in Lady Katherine’s eyes as she glanced at him. “I intend to throw a ball this Season also, though it is not something I have ever done before. Tell me, ladies, if you might, what does one need to make a very successful and, as you have said Lady Katherine, an enjoyable ball?” It was not a question he truly needed answered for, to his mind, the answer was more than obvious. All that was required for a successful ball was a superb orchestra, food and drink provided for the guests and a ballroom that was beautifullydecorated – and with gardens open to the guests also, should it be possible. What else was there for him?
“I think the first thing that is required, Your Grace, is to have those of good character invited to your ball.”
Nathanial’s shoulders slumped immediately. This was not at all what he had thought of. “Good character?”
Lady Katherine bit her lip and looked away but Lady Amelia was instantly ready to encourage her.
“What would you say to that, Lady Katherine? Recall that His Grace has been absent from society for some time so whatever explanation we can give him will be of great benefit, I am sure.” Lady Amelia glanced to him and Nathanial quickly nodded, looking again to Lady Katherine who, thankfully, had stopped biting her lip.
