Well, if you put it like that…
Beckett
For future reference, saying hello to people is my least favourite thing to do.
However, I’m exceedingly grateful that a horse vet was prepared to take on the business end of things.
Of course we’ll go together.
Mary
‘The business end of things?’ Am I a horse, or what?
Beckett
Sorry. I’m woefully out of practice at making conversation with people of sound mind. I’ll try again.
I’m grateful Yara was there to tackle what was going on in your nether regions.
Or is this any better…?
I’m relived an equine expert was prepared to assist you in your personal matter.
Mary
STOP NOW
Beckett
If you refuse to use basic punctuation it’s impossible for me to tell whether you’re disgusted or amused by my ex-medic sense of humour.
Mary
STOP NOW!!!!!!
Beckett
I’m going to go with impressed.
I sent him a row of alternating cry-laughing and eye-rolling emojis, because while under any other circumstances a man I barely knew making flippant comments about what had actually happened regarding my nether regions (nakedness for a start…) would have resulted in me instantly blocking him, he had been my saviour on that terrifying, unimaginable, beautiful and what ended up as most tender of nights. After sharing a moment so raw, this fundamental of human experiences, when nothing can be toned down, filtered or politely ignored, joking about the state I’d been in, how people I’d never met before had seen things that would otherwise have horrified me, was the best possible way to deal with it.
Besides, it was probably the first time I’d heard anyone use the term nether regions in real life, and I was laughing hard enough to make my pelvic floor beg for mercy.
Although, my mental haze did briefly wonder what he meant about not speaking to people of ‘sound mind’. Was he making a nasty remark about Tanya, or Sonali? Given the complete lack of disrespect in anything he’d said so far, I decided to let that thought float back into the haze and sent another message.
Mary
Are you free tomorrow?
It might have been too short notice, but the truth was, I felt so lonely and lost that even tomorrow wasn’t soon enough.
Beckett
The church is more likely to be open on Sunday. I could pick you up at about twelve?
Mary
Perfect, see you then x
