Page 108 of Lean On Me


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I showed Polly round, pointing out the foibles that accompany an old house. She nodded and smiled, and asked questions about what I would take with me to Perry’s and what would stay, her brain whirring with plans and ideas.

I called the landlady to seal the deal, and after a breathless hug of thanks, she rushed back to Esme, who would be getting ready for a feed.

I ignored the feeling of dread in my guts at the prospect of giving up my house. My safe place. My independence. Perry’s house had a fancy lock system, burglar alarm, security lights and Perry. Time to let go of the ‘needing my own house’ issue.

I changed into one of the designer dresses Perry had bought me, attempted to cover up the haunted look on my face with dabs of make-up, slipped on a pair of obscenely expensive shoes, and braced myself to look in the mirror.

Yikes.

I closed my eyes, took a few fortifying breaths – out with the stress, in with the calm, Hester style – and took another peek.

It was only a haircut. But my hair had been such a defining part of me; without it, I felt more vulnerable, not less. Like a turtle without its shell. I probably weighed a lot less, too. Instead of my usual mane, a razor-sharp, chocolate bob swung an inch above my jawline. It brought out the green in my eyes, contrasting dramatically with my creamy complexion.

‘Come on, Faith. You can pull this off.’

I straightened my spine and pulled my shoulders back. Tipped my chin up a couple of millimetres. Remembered the timid little girl with her cloud of red curls, cowering as she tried to make herself invisible. The reflection in the mirror scowled. This woman had poise. She looked striking. Anything but invisible. This woman commanded a second look.

A perfect disguise.

I marched round to Perry’s in my high heels, swishing my hair and tossing cool glances at the young men lingering outside the shop who whistled through their teeth at me. I did need to duck behind a tree a couple of times to tug my dress back down, as the silky material kept riding up. I also skidded on a patch ofslippery wet pavement, tumbling into a wall and laddering my tights. The wind played havoc with my hair, too short to tuck safely behind my ears, and the tiny handbag I’d brought instead of my rucksack kept sliding off my shoulder, so I had to hitch it back up every few steps. I had a way to go in perfecting my new persona, but nevertheless, I could stride through the streets with some confidence, sure Kane would see nothing of Rachel if he happened to see this new Faith.

Perry looked surprised when he saw me, but quickly regained composure. Encouraging, as it was nothing compared to the shock he would feel once I started talking. He beckoned me into the living room, giving me a chance to steel my nerves while he fetched me a drink.

He handed it to me with a kiss. ‘You look gorgeous. I’ll miss those curls, but it’s kind of sexy having you look so different. Like a whole new you.’

‘I hope there wasn’t too much wrong with the old me.’

‘There could be nothing wrong with any version of you. Red hair, brown hair, scruffy jeans or a ballgown. That’s just the wrapping. It’s the you underneath I love.’

I took a deep breath. ‘What if the person underneath isn’t what you think?’

He tugged on a strand of my hair. ‘Half the time, I don’t know what I think. You are a mystery to me, Faith. An enigma. It’s part of your appeal: the challenge to find out what lies beneath. Discover what makes you tick.’

If this was true, he’d done a brilliant job of hiding it.

‘I said this morning I needed to talk to you, and part of that might help explain. I want to tell you about my family.’

‘Great. You can tell everyone. I’m sure they’ll be dying to know. And don’t worry, nobody’s expecting to hear you’re actually twenty-fourth in line to the throne, or have an ancestral home hidden away somewhere. It doesn’t matter how humble your beginnings, we Uppertons are a welcoming lot.’

‘What?’

‘No, really. One of Mother’s grandparents worked as a housemaid, and nobody thinks any the less of her.’

‘Perry, slow down a minute, please. This isn’t about my social status.’

The doorbell rang. Perry stood up. ‘That’ll be them. Fantastic. You can regale us over dinner.’

A minute later, he ushered ‘them’ in. Larissa and Milton, of course. Aunt Eleanor to make things even better.

‘My goodness.’ Larissa pecked the air to the side of my face. ‘You look almost like one of us.’ She scrutinised my head. ‘Not a bad job either. Is this the girl you’ve booked for the wedding?’

‘Yes.’

‘Hmph. Milton, will you remind me to let the stylist know we don’t need him for Faith? It’ll give him more time for the others.’ She turned back to me. ‘Is she doing the bridesmaids?’

‘Yes. You knew this. We talked about it ages ago.’

‘Well, seeing is believing and all that. She might not have been quiteNottinghamshire Lifestandard.’