After a chilly Easter Sunday barbeque with Ezra’s elderly mother, his brother, niece and nephew, I enjoyed a final night in the farmhouse before heading back to Riverbend straight after Muffin’s walk.
It felt odd, as the heathland softened into Nottinghamshire’s gentle hills. The closer I got to Sherwood Forest, to Riverbend – to Gideon – I felt an expanding glow inside not too dissimilar to how I had felt when heading in the opposite direction a few days earlier.
It felt like I was coming home.
29
I found Hattie asleep in her usual spot on the sunroom sofa, still wearing pyjamas.
‘Do you know how draining it is?’ she asked, pushing the curls out of her face with a trembling hand once I’d gently woken her. ‘Spending a whole day pretending to be fine, when inside, you’re disintegrating? I thought it would be easier with just Gideon and Agnes, less effort. But it was worse because they were focussed on me the whole time.’
‘That must have been tough.’
I held back any comment about how much easier it would be if she didn’t have to pretend.
‘Gideon wanted us to walk around Clumber Park, to see the bluebells. Initially, I faked a migraine, but then the stress of it all produced an actual migraine, which conversely made things easier.’
I braved a glance in the kitchen, which to my surprise, was spotless.
‘Gideon,’ Hattie said, with a wry smile as she shuffled past on her way to get dressed. ‘I’d only eaten a few bits and bobs the rest of the weekend, so it wasn’t too bad before he got here.’
She paused, resting one hand on my arm. ‘You look wonderful. I can’t wait to hear all about your weekend. But I’m so glad you’re back. Being horribly ill is a lonely business all by yourself.’
This time, I couldn’t resist. ‘There is a way to solve that.’
‘I know. Let me get dressed, and I’ll be straight on it.’
* * *
‘Hi, Hattie, you look like crap.’ Kalani smiled as she flung open the door.
‘Believe me, I feel even worse,’ Hattie replied, causing Kalani to stiffen in surprise. ‘Pour me an Earl Grey and I’ll fill you in.’
We spent a tense few minutes bringing out pots of tea and plates of scones, sandwiches and cakes before everyone was sitting down and staring at Hattie, daring her to make them wait any longer.
‘You might remember I had my spleen taken out a few years ago.’
They all nodded.
‘Well, after lots of tests, last week, the doctor told me that the infection I had then is back. It’s pretty nasty, and there’s nothing to take out this time so I’m going to have to live with it. They’ll start treatment in a few weeks if it doesn’t clear up. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to think about it until I knew for sure.’
I stared hard at my teacup, telling myself this was better than nothing.
‘A spleen infection in your non-existent spleen?’ Deirdre asked.
‘An infection in the empty space where my spleen used to be.’ Hattie shrugged. ‘And a few other places around about it. A few surviving clusters must have been lying in wait, biding their time until I was run-down enough to succumb again.’
‘So that explains it,’ Laurie said. ‘I knew you couldn’t be the only woman, ever, who loses weight due to the menopause.’
‘What does “pretty nasty” mean?’ Kalani asked, her face taut with concern.
‘Crippling exhaustion, stomach pains, no appetite and generally feeling like crap warmed up,’ Hattie clarified. ‘And things may get worse before I get better.’
‘You’re assistant-less until Deirdre starts,’ Laurie said. ‘So how can we help?’
Hattie sat back. She’d been waiting for this question. ‘Sophie has been amazing, cooking for us, supporting me with work, but what I really need help with is my party.’
‘What party? I haven’t been invited to a party.’ Kalani bristled. ‘I didn’t know anything about a party.’
