‘The me that is assertive enough not to spend my evening making an animal out of soggy newspaper,’ Kalani said, with a toothy grin to show she was joking.
‘Hopefully not. But the being-sarcastic-to-mask-her-vulnerability you will be fine,’ Hattie replied, blowing a kiss.
* * *
‘How’s it going?’ Deirdre asked, stretching her arms up as she wandered over to my table an hour or so later.
‘Wow, Soph!’
I froze for a microsecond. The second time we’d met and I wasSoph.
‘This is amazing!’
I stepped back, unable to hide my smile. I’d spent a lot of time making sculptures from chicken wire, a very long time ago, in that other life, when creating beautiful things had been my passion. Today, I’d crafted a wolf, ears pricked, mouth hanging open to reveal sharp teeth and a lolling, friendly tongue.
‘What does it mean?’
‘I think we’ll maybe share that when everyone’s finished?’
‘I’m finished, and Kalani finished ages ago. How about you, Laurie; are you done yet?’
A few minutes later, the Gals convened on the Beanbags of Blubbering to showcase their animals, which we would be painting another time, once they were fully dry.
Laurie went first.
She’d done a plain sort-of round shape. Dangling off the bottom of it was a tangled mass of ribbons, in a multitude of colours.
‘This is me.’
‘It looks like a round blob,’ Kalani said. ‘With a mess hanging off the bottom.’
‘Well, it was meant to be a jellyfish, but you’ve got the point.’ Laurie flicked at the clump of ribbons. ‘All this stuff. People. Work. Money. Hot flushes. Yet another email from school demanding an explanation for why my daughter insists on wearing her uniform the wrong way round, walking backwards down the corridors and calling herself, “Arolf”. I don’t know why she flips everything back to front, all right? I also don’t know what lethal fungi and bacteria are breeding in the pit that used to be my son’s bedroom. Right now, I don’t have time to care thanks to being too busy helping my dad up and down the stairs, because he “feels funny” about having a stairlift put in. I’m too knackered after getting up at four to run a bakery, and chasing my darling husband’s ruddy pigeons, because apparently that’s his hobby now, so it’s become my part-time, unpaid job. So, who am I? I don’t even know. Where have I gone? Suffocating somewhere beneath everyone else’s needs and problems. Can I do anything about it? Probably, but my brain is too fried to figure out what that might be. I’m a jellyfish, blobbing about with no backbone.’
‘Wow. That’s a lot.’ Deirdre nodded.
‘Too much.’ Kalani looked horrified.
‘Brilliant, Laurie. Thank you for sharing.’ Hattie smiled. ‘Perhaps you’d like to take your sculpture home to show Howard?’
‘He thinks I’m taking Dad to the chiropodist. He wanted me to help install some new perches in the pigeon loft so I made up an excuse.’
‘Right.’ Hattie looked thoughtful. ‘We’ll move on, then. Kalani?’
‘Is that a worm?’ Laurie asked, looking at Kalani. ‘Because I think that’s a bit harsh, even for you.’
‘What do you mean,even for me? And no, it’s a snake. Shedding its skin, as you can see, here. Revealing the fresh, soft Kalani underneath. Leaving the crusty, cold Kalani skin behind. This is the me I’m starting to become.’ She glanced up, hesitation in her eyes. ‘I hope.’
‘It’s perfect,’ we all agreed, until she was almost able to believe it.
I went next. ‘I decided to make a wolf. I suppose I see myself as kind of a loner. Travelling around from place to place. I don’t know if that’s what wolves do, but it seemed apt.’
‘Wolves live in a pack,’ Deirdre said. ‘They only go it alone when looking for a mate or a place to start a family. Soph, you’ve finally found your pack!’
‘Now all you need is a mate,’ Laurie added, eyes lighting up with excitement. ‘We could help you find them, too, if you like?’
‘Thanks, but I’m very happy being single.’
‘Hmm.’ Hattie gave the wolf a nonchalant pat on the head. ‘You also seem pretty happy hanging about with my cousin.’
