‘Okaaaay…?’ Cillian paused, clearly preferring to know the names of the random people he was serving.
‘Isaac.’
‘Isaac, perfect. So, if you aren’t here to buy suits, how can I help you?’
‘I need an outfit for my engagement party,’ Arthur said.
‘Oh, so you’re engaged! Right. Perfect. The wedding togs will come later, then.’
‘No,’ Arthur said, with an oblivious grin. ‘Not engaged yet, either.’
‘They’re looking for a couple of outfits each,’ I said, before Arthur got around to mentioning the Boys to Men project and making us sound even sadder than we were. ‘Smart casual, something to wear for an evening out with friends, or—’
‘Basically, whatever you’ve got that will make it impossible for women to resist us, we want those,’ Arthur added.
It was going to be a long day.
32
In the end, we only made it to the first few shops on my list. I’d bumbled on about a capsule wardrobe, statement pieces and other waffle regurgitated from the websites I’d scoured, and then spent two hours trying to coax them away from one extreme (a lavender boiler suit) or another (a virtually identical blue shirt to the five Elliot already owned). Arthur was more than happy to allow the shop assistants to treat him like their dress-up doll, with mixed results. Isaac ended up mostly sticking with me, despite objecting to most of my suggestions, which I knew from lifelong experience was mostly due to pure stubbornness, not because ‘only creepy midlife crisis men wear patterned shirts’.
Elliot, on the other hand, preferred to browse alone, occasionally venturing into a changing room with a look of determination on his face, before leaving again seconds later, his expression one of faint disgust. For now, though, I had to focus on my brother. Elliot’s time would come.
‘So,’ Isaac began, with a casual tone that I knew indicated he felt anything but. ‘You were round at Connie’s the other night.’
‘I popped over for a couple of hours,’ I murmured, mirroring his nonchalant tone as only a twin can do.
‘Had a good time?’
‘We did, thanks.’ I pulled a lightweight jumper off a rack that I knew would make his eyes look amazing, and held it up. A completely futile attempt to get him off this topic.
He pretended to consider it, even going as far as fondling the fabric. ‘What did you do?’
‘We drank rhubarb gin and tonics and ate snacks in her garden.’
‘So mostly talking, then.’ He shook his head, no, to the sweater. I added it to the ‘maybe’ pile in my arms. ‘She… happen to mention me?’
‘She messaged you while I was there to ask about that ten-droid thing. So yes, your name came up.’
‘And?’ He stopped, grabbing a pair of purple leather trousers that looked skinny enough to fit Wilf and thrusting them at me. ‘Don’t make me sweat here, sis. You know what I’m asking.’
‘Yes, andyouknow that it’s not fair to ask me to blab about what my friend and I discussed in private.’ I accepted the trousers then put them straight back on the shelf.
‘Come on, I’ll buy the sweater. I’ll buy everything you recommend. The twin code says blabbing is obligatory under these circumstances.’
‘You won’t buy anything until you’ve tried it on first.’ He had me with the twin code, though. I blew out a long sigh. ‘Okay. I will say this. She really enjoyed the day at Newstead. She likes you, and most importantly she really likes how you are with Wilf.’
Isaac dropped his head in relief.
‘However.’
‘No,’ he groaned. ‘Leave it at she likes me.’
‘Okay.’ I started flicking through some T-shirts.
‘I didn’t mean that.’ He bent so close that his breath tickled my ear, which he knew made me shiver in revulsion. ‘I won’t sleep, eat, or stop annoying you until I know the however.’
I stepped back, taking a couple of seconds to formulate an answer that would betray neither my brother nor my friend. ‘You were right about being in the friend zone. But, honestly, I think for now that’s a good place to be. Connie is deadly serious about who she’s going to let into her and Wilf’s life. Keep being there for her, showing her that you’re a decent guy, without putting any expectations on her, and when it’s the right time, she’ll know that you’re worth the risk.’
