‘Why didn’t you tell me? Hey, neighbour, I noticed you needed new tyres, thought I’d make it my random act of kindness for the week.’He’d been watching me.
‘Something gave me the impression you wouldn’t take kindly to my help. Oh, yeah, it might have been you hollering that you didn’t want my help.’
‘You were pretty rude to me when I first arrived.’
‘Right back at you, woman.’
‘Well. I was dealing with some issues.’
‘As I said…’
‘Is there someone out there?’ Sarah’s voice drifted across the Common. Mack went rigid.
‘Don’t move,’ he muttered against the top of my head. ‘She’s leaning out of the upstairs window. If we keep still she can’t see us.’
There was no point in retorting that we weren’t doing anything wrong, or that minutes before Mack had been going to knock on her door with the express purpose of telling Sarah we were here. Me, huddled on a bench, in the complete dark, my glasses off, jacket skew-whiff, with a married man. It was all I could do not to spring up and gallop home.
‘The police have been round,’ Sarah shouted. ‘They’re patrolling all night. I can have them here in seconds. With dogs.’
Mack’s arm began to quake where it gripped the bench next to me. He let out a tiny snort of laughter.
‘You aresonot a spy,’ I murmured. He sucked in a deep breath, and tried to hold it, his whole body vibrating.
‘Jamie?’ Sarah asked, with a trace of hope. ‘Is that you? You can just come and knock on the bloody door, you know.’
Mack and I willed each other not to release the bubbling volcano of mirth as Sarah continued to call out small talk to the non-existent Jamie. After a minute or so Edison asked, ‘Who are you talking to, Mummy? Is it Spider-Man?’
‘Nah, Jamie,’ she replied. ‘But come to think of it, I have never seen Jamie and Spider-Man in the same room. Have you?’
‘Jamie, are you Spider-Man?’ Edison yelled across the clearing. ‘Will you come in and show us your web shooters? Mummy wants to see your Spidey sense. Do you want to see his Spidey sense, Mummy?’
‘Please stop,’ I whispered through clenched jaws. ‘I can’t take much more of this.’
‘Jamie!’ Edison yelled. ‘Why won’t you say anything?’
‘Try thinking about the Hoard,’ Mack breathed. ‘Tax returns. Fisher. Whether or not it’s about to start raining.’
‘The reason we’re out here in the first place,’ I muttered. And suddenly nothing was funny any more. Not even when Edison offered Jamie/Spider-Man his teddy to cuddle.
‘She’s gone.’ Mack spoke quietly, handing me my glasses. He stretched the stiffness from his limbs and strode over to retrieve the bike, nodding to a pile of dock leaves. ‘Rub it on the nettle stings.’
‘I’m fine.’ I ignored the leaves, taking hold of the bike.
‘So you keep saying.’ Mack didn’t let go of the handlebars.
‘We’d better get a move on. I wouldn’t be surprised if Sarah does call the police.’
‘We can walk back to the village and get a taxi.’
‘After all that shouting, no one will still be hanging around.’
‘I’m more concerned with whether you’ll be terrified into another panic attack,’ he whispered.
‘I said. I’m okay.’ I tugged on the bike until he let go, and started wheeling it across to the exit. Mack soon caught up with me. ‘Do you want to hold my hand or something?’
‘Why, are you feeling nervous?’ I shot back. ‘I’ll go with the or something, thanks.’ Right then, feeling queasy at how lovely it had felt to have him touching me – albeit between two layers of clothing – I couldn’t have meant it more.
‘Just trying to be a good friend,’ he muttered. ‘But I guess that moment’s over.’
