He nods, shoving another fistful of mashed potatoes into his mouth. I have to work hard to resist laughing. There are not even words to describe how relieved I was when Warren outgrew his hangry stage. I was terrified and seriously questioning who I pissed off in my past life to get stuck with three people who can’t handle being hungry for twenty minutes. But the second Warren outgrew his bottles and started eating big people food, he also outgrew getting hangry.
“So,” Roman starts. “Did you and Eli decide on a time to go shopping?”
Eli’s face flushes and Holden nods. “Yeah, we’re going tomorrow, right?”
Eli fiddles with his fork for a second, but nods. “Yeah, as long as you’re sure it’s okay.”
“It’s perfect,” Holden says, grinning.
Beck stands up and grabs his wallet. I know where this is going, and Holden is already glaring. My lord, if these two start their arguing tonight, I’m gonna lose it. “Here,” he says, holding out a credit card to Holden.
Holden drops his hands to his lap under the table, but says nothing.
“Take it, Hold.”
Holden raises an eyebrow. Roman sighs, likely feeling the same as me. I think the two of us have given up on trying to keep them in line at this point. I know I’ve accepted my fate. I glance at him just in time to see him roll his eyes. Yeah, he’s definitely feeling the same as me.
“Holden,” Beck tries again. “He’s my kid, yeah? Take my card.”
Eli gasps. But Holden isn’t deterred. “Nope. He’s my nephew.”
Another gasp. Then a giggle that sounds a little off. All four of us turn to Eli at the same time. He lets out another strange, choked-off laugh, and then he’s covering his face and sobbing.
“Look at what you did, Beckett,” Holden chastises, jumping up to wrap his arms around Eli.
Eli melts into Holden, who’s glaring at Beck like he might jump across the table and murder him. Well, isn’t this dinner turning out to be so fun? Eli makes a noisethat sounds far more like a laugh than a sob, his shoulders shaking.
He pulls back from Holden and wipes his eyes. “God, I’m a mess.” But he giggles again, and this time no sob follows. “You guys are actually fighting over who gets to pay for my shopping trip. Are you always like this?”
“Always,” Roman and I answer simultaneously. He holds his hand out, and I fist-bump him with a grin.
Eli laughs again. “You guys are… something else. I don’t think anyone’s ever fought over me like that before.”
Ouch.
“Uncle Beck likes to pay for things,” Wren says, shrugging. Eli looks at her with a slight smile on his face. “Daddy says it’s his love language.”
“See,” Beck says, gesturing toward Wren. “Why won’t you just let me do it?”
Holden sighs, but steps back from Eli and holds his hand out to Beck. “Fine. Thank you.”
He’s not going to use it. I can already tell. Sure, he’s putting on a nice front for Beck, but there’s no way in hell he’ll follow through and actually use Beck’s card. He’s very much the forgiveness, not permission type. Besides, it’s not like Beck’sactuallygoing to do anything about it.
After everyone has chilled out and gone back to eating, a wave of nervousness passes over me. I know that there’s noreason for me to be nervous. I’m incredibly confident and secure in my relationship with Holden, but aside from a conversation years ago, we haven’t talked about marriage.
By the time that everyone is done eating, I’m practically dying.
I clear my throat, and stand up. All the eyes in the room turn to me, and I sit back down. Beck lets out a little laugh that he tries to cover up with a cough. Holden side-eyes him, but says nothing, which is shocking to say the least. I force a deep breath into my lungs and try again. Inconspicuously pulling the ring out of my pocket, I stand yet again, and this time, I sink to one knee in front of Holden. He gasps, bringing his hand to his chest as he stares down at me with wide eyes.
“Hi,” I say, like an idiot, but hey, he started our relationship with a handshake. I think I’m allowed to have a certain level of stupidity going on when I’m about to ask the man I love more than life to marry me. I clear my throat again, try to swallow down the lump already there. I take one of his hands in mine and hold the ring up with the other. “The first time I met you, you knocked my entire world off course. I wasn’t at all prepared to get caught in your orbit. I was scared and, in some ways, still grieving. You changed all of that for me. You turned our house into a home. You brought joy and love back into my life. Youstuck by me through some of the worst times of my life. You never gave up on me, or us. You supported me and our daughter.”
Holden has tears streaming down his cheeks, but I know if I even allow myself the opportunity to think or pause, I’m going to be right there with him, so I don’t. “I didn’t think there was anyone left for me in the world. But then you came along. The second you slid your hand into mine and introduced yourself, I knew I would be irrevocably changed. And I was. And what a change it was.”
Holden nods, squeezing my hand a little. “I love you with all that I am, and I really hope you’ll do me the honor of becoming my husband. Will you marry me, darlin’?”
I take a deep breath, trying to ignore the way the hand I’m holding the ring with is shaking. There’s a pause—too long of a pause, honestly. Holden giggles, which is my favorite sound in the entire world, but maybe not while I’m asking him to marry me. And then he giggles some more. And within seconds he’s laughing. Big, belly laughs that seem to come from his very soul. I have no idea what’s so funny about me asking him to marry me, and judging by the silence around the room, no one else does, either.
I sigh, feeling a little out of sorts. I mean, I just poured my heart out, and he’s laughing. “What’s so funny,darlin’?”
