“Unless this isn't about revenge at all,” he says slowly. “The others said you two seemed happy. That you were different with her. You’re just making an excuse to make this easier on me, aren’t you?”
“They're idiots,” I snap, but heat crawls up my neck. “This marriage is business, nothing more. A way to gain power through her family and, yes, to eventually show her what it feels like to be discarded.”
The lie tastes bitter on my tongue. Images flash through my mind—Lilibeth laughing, her eyes bright when I come home early, the way she fits against me when I make love to her.
Nikandr sees it all written on my face. “You're in love with her.”
“No,” I say without thinking. “Never. I'll never love her after what she did to you.”
Nikandr now looks at me with pity, and I hate seeing him that way. His tone is gentler now, kinder. “Agafon, I fucked myself up. Not her. Me.”
“You said—”
“Whatever I said was in the past. We can move on, Agafon. If you love her, be happy. Don’t waste your life away fighting to fix the past.”
“I don’t love her,” I say, coldly. “Like I said, I’m not wasting anything. She hurt you, and I want to give her a taste of her medicine.”
“That’s not what I heard,” Nikandr frowns. “Stop lying, Agafon. To yourself, to me. Even if you did marry her for revenge, that’s no longer true. You know that.”
His words hit with the force of a physical blow. One more word out of him, and I might no longer know the truth. Already,in this conversation, I can feel myself waver, question if it is revenge I seek…or something more.
But something more was never on the table, was it? Something more can’t exist. Not when Nikandr sits before me and memories of his troubled past surface in my mind.
If I didn’t marry her for revenge, then what was all of this for?
“I told you the truth,” I say with gritted teeth. “Now make of it what you will.”
“Whatever you say, Brother,” Nikandr says, and that pity he feels for me is once again etched across his face. I don’t bother telling him to wipe it off when, in my heart, I too feel sorry for my words.
Chapter 23 - Lilibeth
My ears burn at the words I’m hearing, and the world around me tunnels into just darkness.
It can’t be. I came down here to join Agafon for that drink, but when I heard loud voices, I stopped outside. I was about to turn when I heard him say he only married me for revenge because of what I did to Nikandr.
WhatIdid toNikandr?
I clasp my hand over my mouth to stifle my sobs. What did I ever do to deserve this? Why the hell does Agafon think I ruined Nikandr? Most of all, was he really only pretending all this time?
And here I am, such a fool for thinking I love him. The memories from a few hours earlier come rushing back. I was lying there on his desk, with him hovering over me, and I remember thinking I love him.
“No,” I hear Agafon say with conviction. “Never. I'll never love her after what she did to you.”
I stumble backward and feel that lump in my throat travel down to my chest, making it hard to breathe. I think I might have a panic attack. A fool. I’m an utter fool for thinking I love this man. My lungs squeeze tight. I have to get out. Now.
I have nothing on me but my phone, yet I can’t spend another minute in this house, near Agafon, near Nikandr. The entire family is nothing but a bunch of liars, I think to myself as the tears fall down my face.
With just my phone in hand, I run out of the house. A guard tries to ask if I need a car, as the staff knows I can come and go at my choosing as long as I have security, and I wavehim off. “My brother’s picking me up outside,” I lie. Right about now, my brain isn’t working on coming up with something more plausible.
But I seem to be in such a rush and speak with such conviction that he doesn’t question me further. Besides, they won’t dare insinuate that my family is careless with me by cross-checking whether I speak the truth. My lie is so audacious that it’s believable.
I know the guard will get in trouble later, but at this point, I don’t care. I need distance between myself and this lie I've been living. Between myself and the man I've been falling in love with, who apparently married me for revenge.
Once outside the house, I run down the block and hail a cab. Last time I ran, Agafon tracked me down within an hour using my phone's location. This time around, I turn off my phone’s location tracking and GPS. There’s no way I’m letting him come after me.
After what I’ve heard, I never want to hear from him again.
It’s only once I’m in the car and the driver asks where it is I’m going to that I feel my mind go blank. Where the hell should I go? I don’t want to face my family with this embarrassing truth right now. I defended Agafon, I brought him into our folds and made my family believe he was good to me. Good for me.
