She straightened her blouse. “That’s what you’ve been doing. And I’m okay staying here, with you.”
With her plan, she’d always be in danger and his pulse raced. He’d end up exactly like his father, unable to live with guilt and put a bullet in his own head. “No, that’s not what I meant.”
Her face crumbled and his skin burned like he'd stepped in fire, but he needed her to go now. She needed to be safe. “What do you mean?”
How did she not see? If he lost control, he’d destroy her. He widened his stance because he needed to hold himself together. “It’s time for you to go. Go live in your home. Take my sister and her daughter with you.”
Her gaze locked with his and at least she didn’t cry as she asked calmly, “Take them too? Why are you sending us all away?”
Her gaze bore into his soul like laser beams. He pivoted toward an arrow slit. “Because I never should have married you or brought you here. It’s not safe for you.”
She said in her soft, sweet voice, “I’m safe, with you.”
No. His heart beat a mile a minute and no amount of gasoline in an engine might get him to go any faster right now. He shook his head and held onto the wall as if he could keep the castle together himself. “Then you’re a fool, and we both know you’re not. You have a crush on me because I stole your virginity, but that’s not a good enough reason to claim love.”
“What?” She tapped her foot on the ground.
He turned around and rubbed at the tension in his neck. “You don’t have to love the first man that touches you. That’s some sixteenth century myth from when women were treated as property.”
Her nose crinkled. “That’s not why.”
Astorre swallowed and wished she had some magic answer where he didn’t need to let go of her when he asked, “What do you know about me that you can possibly love?”
She placed her hand on his chest like she could reach his heart inside him. “I know that you’re a good man who treats me right, and you understand a little of what my life was like without feeling pity. I thought we were friends before we married.”
The storm outside thundered and he stepped away from her touch. She had no idea the truth. She couldn’t. If she stayed, he could transform and hurt her. He had violence within him. He turned away from the window, toward her. “You… were wrong. I don’t deserve you or your love or anything you offer. In time you’ll find someone who is worthy.”
She touched the gold cross at her throat. “What happens to you and your title if I leave?”
Answers. He hadn’t thought this through. All he knew was that she needed to leave. Now. Before he turned into a monster too. “I’ll deal with the royal family and… a divorce, or better yet, cover your absence so you can keep your own titles and we'll just live separately. Once it’s clear my sister and her daughter get the castle…that was the plan all along before I met you-”
“No,” she interrupted and he instantly stepped back, well aware of how his heart raced while she said, “Look, I’ll go if you want me to. I can’t force you to love me, but don’t fill out anything without a clear head. You can find me at my parent’s estate when you’re ready.”
Calm, kind, and beautiful were three reasons he didn’t deserve Clara as she embodied all three traits. His veins were pumped with adrenaline though he tried to sound reasonable when he said, “I’ll contact you, and I won’t hurt your own claim to your birthright.”
She brushed soft fingers against his cheek. His hair stood on end. “I… really love you, Astorre. I thought you were my prince.”
No. He’d never be a prince, even if he was from Avce and distantly related to the crown. She'd meant a hero, and he was a monster in disguise. He peered into her pretty brown eyes and said, “My sister was right to call me a beast… you need to get out now.”
She lowered her hand like he’d struck her. He feared hurting her worse which was exactly why she needed to disappear. If he let her stay, she’d eventually hate him when she saw the truth about who he might become if he let himself believe in love.
Chapter 16
Clara’s entire body ached to sob. Her ducts were filled with unshed tears but she would not cry.
All her life she’d known the truth.
She ruined everything she touched eventually. And it wasn’t just business. It had only taken her days to ruin her marriage. Nothing had changed about her. And the note from his sister that she wasn’t going anywhere with Clara had just sealed it.
Clara the unfortunate wasn’t safe harbor for anyone, and she was destined to be alone.
She packed her small rolling bag from Miami with her meager belongings, leaving all the clothes from the castle hanging in the closet. She put the jewelry away.
None of this was hers. Clara Fortuna’s destruction had spread here too.
She zipped up her bag, left the bedroom she'd shared too briefly with Astorre, and headed downstairs with her head lowered.
No one approached her in the halls or the great room.
