31
ALYSSA
Alyssa was sitting, staring straight ahead, wondering if she’d somehow entered some kind of parallel universe. Or maybe she was in one of those movies where it turns out you’re living a false reality, in an artificial world, and there are actually secret cameras everywhere and millions of people at home, eating pizza while they watch you go about your life on their telly.
It was even more shocking because, until ten minutes ago, everything had been perfectly normal. If Lachlan Morden, former arch nemesis, sitting at her kitchen table, waiting for the AA to come out with a pump to reinflate his tyres could be called normal.
It had definitely paled into insignificance compared to what had happened next, when her mother had come into the kitchen with Stan McLean following behind her. That had immediately puzzled Alyssa. She’d only ever seen the man in passing, and now he was apparently hanging out with her mother? Her first thoughts had been that perhaps there was a problem with the party. Or that he wanted to make a request on Jessie’s behalf. Had they run out of wine again?
Dorinda had immediately tossed Lachlan out. ‘Can I have a moment with my daughter please?’
Lachlan had shot up and Alyssa could almost see him considering his options. He could go into the café and join the party. Or go freeze his bollocks off outside.
He’d decided on the latter option. ‘I’ll just wait outside at my car.’
Meanwhile, her mother had slipped into a seat at the table. ‘Darling, I have something to share with you.’
How much champagne had her mother sunk? Not that this was a particularly unusual occurrence – Ginny used to joke that their mum listed her occupation as Wine Chugger on her passport application form.
She’d tuned back into what her mum was saying. ‘The thing is, Stan and I…’
Stan and I?Alyssa had no idea that there was aStan and I.
‘…have something to discuss with you. Stan wanted to talk to you tomorrow, but I wasn’t convinced he wouldn’t bugger off to Tenerife and dodge the whole issue, so I’m insisting we tell you now.’
Definitely must be a complaint about the party, Alyssa had decided. Someone had said earlier that the ladies’ toilet was out of commission, so maybe it was something to do with that, but her grandad had gone off to check and had assured her it was fine.
Her confusion had lasted even after Stan had sat down next to her mother and begun speaking. ‘Alyssa, I’m so sorry about this. I still maintain that this isn’t the right time or place…’ He’d cast a glance at Dorinda, who’d smiled sweetly back at him. ‘But since your mum was set on telling you tonight, and I feel that this is my responsibility too, I wanted to do it myself. You see… you see…’
Alyssa’s stare had been going from her mum to Stan back toher mum to Stan. And the fact that he was taking forever to get to the point made it even more excruciating.
Drunk Dorinda had obviously felt the same because she’d suddenly lost patience, rolled her eyes and blurted, ‘He might be your father.’
Of all the things Alyssa could have imagined coming out of her mother’s mouth, that wasn’t on the list.
‘What? Is this a joke, because it’s not funny.’
Stan had shaken his head wearily. ‘It’s definitely not a joke and definitely not funny. I’m in a state of shock myself about it all, so I can only imagine how it must feel to hear this and I’m so sorry.’
Alyssa hadn’t even known how to process that, so she’d focused back on the eye of the storm. Leaning forward on her elbows, she’d glared at her mother. ‘I think I’m going to need a bit more information here. I thought my dad was an ex-boyfriend who did a runner when I was a child?’
‘Possibly,’ her mother had admitted. ‘But the reason he did a runner was because he found out… and by “found out” I mean I let it slip that when I began dating him I was still seeing Stan here. We were in love.’
‘We weren’t in love, Dorinda. There have been enough lies. Don’t be adding any more.’ Stan’s words had been dipped in weariness, not anger. He’d turned back to Alyssa. ‘But she’s not lying about our affair. It was a brief fling, but it did happen.’
Maybe it had been the use of the word ‘affair’ that had dropped the bomb of realisation in her mind.
‘Oh no,’ she’d groaned. ‘You were already married to…’
‘Jessie.’ A flash of embarrassment or pain or shame – Alyssa didn’t know him well enough to judge – had crossed his face. ‘Yes. I’m not proud of it. It was a long time ago and it was the only time that I was ever unfaithful.’
‘He was crazy for me,’ Dorinda had interjected, before giving him a touch of side-eye. ‘Although not enough to leave his wife, despite having the option of a life with me.’
‘Dorinda, enough!’ His words were low but sharp, and they’d had the desired effect of shutting her mother up. ‘I was never leaving Jessie and you knew that right from the start.’
Her mum had shrugged and Alyssa had known he was speaking the truth.
‘Although, I’m not sure that matters now,’ Stan had said, ‘because that’s all in the past. I did something terrible that I’ll always be ashamed of, but all that I care about now is that I do the right thing for you and for my family. I’m so sorry, Alyssa. I wish we’d been given the opportunity to have this discussion long before now.’
