Forty years, and all I get is a crappy ornament.
But, of course, she showed her gratitude to the watching crowd with a beaming smile and a bow, which took more acting skill than she’d had to muster for her farewell scene this morning.
‘All we ask now, is that you enjoy every second of your retirement…’
I was sacked…
‘And spend wonderful days with your family…’
I have no one. Not a single family member on this earth.
‘And your friends.’
None of those either. Sacrificed them all for my career. In fact, the last time I had genuine friends, was…
‘And enjoy the memories of a stellar career and four spectacular decades of achievement here atThe Clydeside.’
That was it. 1983. The last time I had genuine friends. How was that a life well lived?
Another rumble of applause, with cheers and hoots of congratulation filled the room and Odette felt the same crushing tightness in her chest that she’d had this morning, right before she’d crumbled into a sobbing mess.
‘Speech! Speech!’ someone in the crowd yelled out.
Odette inhaled, exhaled, used every exercise she’d ever been taught to calm her nerves and her racing heart.
Somehow, by some miracle, she managed to find her voice. ‘I’d just like to say thank you. For forty years. For Agnes McGlinchy. And for the wonderful members of the cast and crew who have shown me so much kindness over the years.’
Except the ones who’ve been truly fucking horrible to me. I hope karma serves up the same kind of misery that it’s doled out to me.
That thought was so powerful, like a kick to the side of the head. Karma. That’s why her life had been a complete shit show. It was why she had no one left. Why she was going to finish her days in lonely misery.
She couldn’t get another word out, so instead, she held up the pathetic glass award and smiled, like a football player holding up a trophy after a winning game.
Karma had screwed her. And the regrets that had been on her mind all day, were the reason that the Gods of Karma were decimating her life.
Once again, Calvin helped her from the stage, and guided her out of the canteen and back to her dressing room. If anyone tried to say a personal goodbye, she didn’t see them, too focused on staring straight ahead, holding it together until she could get out of here and find some kind of way to deal with the prospect of the empty, barren life that was in front of her. If this was what karma had done to her, it was time to start fighting back. And she was ready to start doing that.
Since this morning, an idea had been forming in her mind, but she didn’t think she’d have the strength or courage to see it through. Now she knew that she had to. If she had any hope of putting her life right, she had to make amends for what she’d done forty years ago.
As soon as she got back into the dressing room for the final time, Calvin blew out all the stresses of his day. ‘Right, my lovely, let’s get the hell out of here. We’ve got the studio limo for one more night, so let’s ride home in style, get dolled up, then head out for a feast tonight. It’s on the company credit card so you can eat caviar off your thumbs if you like.’
The mention of the limo brought up another problem that Odette was going to have to contend with. She’d never learned to drive, so she didn’t have a car. How was she going to get around now? The cost of taxis was horrendous and the thought of going on a bus made her shudder. More karma. And besides, her over-60 bus pass was still in a drawer in the kitchen, because she preferred to remain in denial that she was old enough to be eligible for it.
‘Indeed, let’s go,’ she replied, picking up the bag that was packed and sitting by the door. As almost an afterthought, she snatched up her dressing room iPad. Strictly speaking, shesupposed it could be called theft, but she was going to choose to call it a parting gift. She handed it over to Calvin. ‘Can you take this, because on the way I need you to do me a favour.’
If he questioned the liberation of the iPad from the room, he didn’t bring it up. ‘Anything for you,’ he told her, with dramatic exaggeration.
‘Good. Because remember I said I need you to help me find someone I used to know? Well, no time like the present. Her name is Nancy Jenkins.’
14
TRESS
Tress was actually a little taken aback as to how sad she was that Odette was leaving the show. There had been speculation that she had been pushed, as opposed to jumping ship, but Tress didn’t know that for sure. She’d only been with the studio for six months, so she wasn’t on the inside track with production or network decisions yet. She hoped the rumour wasn’t true. Just as she hoped the rumours that Odette could be a demanding diva weren’t true either. Tress had always found her to be perfectly pleasant and she’d enjoyed getting to know her, so she was going to take the stories with a pinch of gossipy salt.
Gossip, she’d realised, was rife in this studio. That’s why she’d only spoken to Rex for two minutes at Odette’s lunch, and even then, there were people around them, so it was purely professional. Although, her face had been burning the whole time, so she’d been relieved when Odette had come over and interrupted them so she could say goodbye.
After Odette left, the assembled crowd split into two groups – those who had imbibed a few glasses of wine and who were looking like they wanted to make a boozy afternoon of it, and theothers who were intent on getting back to work. Tress was in the latter group.
