One by one, everyone made moves to leave. There wasn’t any use in everyone standing vigil around the big house while we waited for news. Everyone could go back to their comfy beds and rest knowing that the Sheriff had eyes on Charlie.
I had even managed to convince Max that we should get some rest, knowing that as soon as we had word that they had infiltrated the warehouse and gotten Charlie out, we wouldn’t be sleeping.
I had to get him to sleep to put my plan in motion, as it was the only logical way to keep him from stopping me. I had been working out details in my mind all afternoon, and knew that if Max caught wind of what I’d planned, he’d insist on doing it himself. I didn’t want him in the middle of all of this. It was my battle to fight.
We stood side by side in the bathroom brushing our teeth, the silence oppressive as my heart beat wildly in my chest. I hoped he wouldn’t notice my shaking hands as I reached forward and turned on the water to wash my toothpaste down the drain.
As Max leaned over to rinse his mouth, his hand resting on the small of my back—a gesture that usually comforted me—it instead filled me with a profound and unsettling sense of dread.
Would he hate me after this was all over?
We padded our way to the bed; him pulling back the covers on his side and me on mine. As soon as we both laid our heads down, he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in close.
I snuggled into his embrace, relishing in the warmth of his chest against my back. The feeling of being in his arms was a comfort I couldn’t explain. It felt like coming home. I sunk into his warm body, not knowing if this would be the last chance we would have to be together.
I loved him completely and without reservation; there was no question in my mind about the depth and of my affection for this man. He had pulled me from the depths of darkness, showing me what it was like to be loved wholly and without reservation.
Max was one of the good ones.
“Goodnight, Trouble.” he yawned, tightening his arm around my waist and tucking his face into the space where my shoulder met the slope of my neck. He pressed a tender kiss right at the juncture, and I sighed in contentedness.
“Goodnight, Cowboy.” I whispered back, barely managing to choke back the sobs that threatened to escape my lips.
I wasn’t watching the clock, but it didn’t take long before his breathing evened out and I could feel his embrace loosen. I waited an extra ten minutes or so before attempting to remove myself from his grasp.
I inched his arm from around my waist, taking extra care not to wake him. Max was a sound sleeper and today had been draining, but I didn’t want to chance having to explain where I was heading, or lie to him.
Once I was confident that I could move without waking him up, I padded to the closet. I had shoved a few things in a small duffel bag at the back of the walk-in closet earlier, under the guise of having to use the bathroom. I’d packed a change of clothes for myself, my cell phone, clothes for Charlie, and my wallet.
Tiptoeing back to the bedroom, I attempted to open the bedside table drawer without making a sound. When it slid open silently, I nearly fell to my knees in relief. So far, luck had been on my side and I wasn’t about to test its limits.
Reaching in, I wrapped my hand around the smooth barrel of Max’s handgun stored at the back.
The first night we had slept in the same room, I had almost peed my pants when he set it in the drawer on his side, fully loaded with the safety off. He had promised that it was okay resting in the drawer and he would put it back in the gun safe in the morning.
He had explained that a gun in the gun safe did nothing in the way of protection, should someone come into the house in the middle of the night. Keeping the gun in the bedside table drawer, loaded and unlocked, gave us a better chance of defense.
I still wasn’t comfortable handling a loaded firearm without Max’s help, but I didn’t want to go into this without some way to protect myself.
I flipped the safety back on as I tucked the gun into a zipper pouch on the outside of my duffle bag so that it was accessible.
Taking one last look around the room, my gaze settled on Max’s sleeping form. The furrow that had been between his brows over the last twenty-four hours had softened. He lookedso serene and at peace. His chest rose and fell in an even cadence, and his lush lips parted with each exhale.
I set the note I’d scribbled earlier on my bedside table and draped the necklace he’d given me yesterday over it, not wanting anything to happen to it in the shuffle. I sent up a silent prayer to whatever being made universal decisions that he would forgive me after all of this if I made it out.
I left our bedroom, walking as quietly as I could and shut the door with a soft snick. I waited with bated breath to make sure it hadn’t woken him before I tip-toed to the front door and repeated the motions.
Once outside, I realized how serene the ranch was at night. A symphony of crickets chirped, their tiny voices blending into a soothing nighttime soundtrack. Though still humid, the air lacked the oppressive weight of the day’s heat; a gentle breeze whispered through the trees, calling out a soft whisper of warning.
Across the field, I could see the fireflies dancing through the air, beckoning all lost souls to send their wishes to the moon. As I stepped off the porch, one landed on my sleep shorts. I stopped and tenderly scooped it into my palm, taking great care to cup it softly as I raised it to my eyes.
The tiny bug, a miniature jewel of orange and black, seemed to peer back at me as it stood in silent wait for my plea, its antennae twitching slightly. I cupped my other hand over it and closed my eyes.
“I wish that for once in my life, everything goes right. I wish that Charlie and I make it out safely, that Max doesn’t hate me, and we can move on with our lives without fear creeping over our shoulders.”
My whispered desire coasted past my lips as I opened my palm and allowed the firefly to fly into the darkness. Itstiny light was a beacon of hope as it soared high into the sky.
I took one last look at the big house, memorizing the gentle sway of Ma’s porch swing. I felt a gentle breeze coast across my skin, almost as if a whisper of acknowledgment from her spirit, a mother’s knowing approval.
