“Marshall….”
Stilling, I lifted my head but didn’t turn around, my hands gripping the throw blanket that Rose had left in a heap on hersofa. I didn’t think I could bear seeing him reject me. It’d be easier for him to talk to the back of my head, right? “Yeah?”
A prolonged pause, and then an audible sigh. “Let me show you to the spare room.”
I felt my shoulders slump at his dismissal, swallowing back the words I wanted so desperately to say.
Why didn’t you kiss me when you had the chance?
You felt it, too, didn’t you? This thing between us?
I’m not seeing something that’s not there, right?
I’d make the leap if you jumped with me. All you’d need to do is ask.
Instead, I replied with a simple and quiet, “Okay.”
Monday
Chapter Five
Daniel
Clenchingmypillowasmy alarm blared at me from the bedside table, I groaned at the ungodly hour. Waking up when it was still dark for morning chores was the one thing I wished I could get used to, but I feared I never would.
Mornings were especially difficult when I’d tossed and turned so much during the night that I could only manage a few hours’ sleep.
Regret filled me as I pushed the pillow away, rolled over onto my back, and shoved the heels of my palms into my gritty eyes.
Why had I chickened out of talking to Marshall about that moment between us last night? The way he’d looked up at me, his fingers clenching against my sides as he leaned into me….
Unless I was very much mistaken, he’d wanted me to kiss him, and holyfuckhad I wanted to do it. There was something about him that called to me, even though we’d known each other for less than a day.
It was like I couldn’t stop touching him. He was the earth, and I was the moon, destined to gravitate around him, tethered by aninvisible bond that was impossible to ignore. Life only felt right, felt settled, when we were together.
But he wastoo young.
I’d tried to tell him that last night. Tried to tell him that nothing could happen between us because we were at different stages of our lives but had swallowed my words down before they could be made real. Something in my gut had rebelled violently at the thought of speaking aloud the words I knew needed to be said, so I’d changed course and shown him the spare room instead. Then I’d gone to bed, tossing and turning and decidedlynot fucking sleepingfor the next four hours while I regretted how much of a coward I’d been.
I was a grown fucking man. I should be able to talk about my feelings.
Ugh.
Feelings.
I kicked at the sheets in a huff.
Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Today. I’d tell him today. I’d clear the air with him so he knew not to expect anything between us, and then we could all continue with our lives like everything was normal. He could stay in the guest room until his Jeep was fixed, then be on his way without a backward glance.
It was the right thing to do. No way for either of us to get attached to the other. No regret. Nothing but a platonic show of hospitality from a Rockdale resident to a traveler passing through. I was doing my civic duty—that was all.
I heaved a sigh and pressed the heels of my palms into my eyeballs again before dragging myself out of bed to start the day.
Fuck my nonexistent ability to lie to myself.
“What do you do for a living, Daniel?”
