“Then perhaps find a way to prove to her that you are here for her, no matter what comes between you,” Stephen suggested.
Allan toyed with the idea, intrigued by it, just as Peter shot out of the nearest bush and almost tackled Stephen to the ground. There was raucous laughter as Stephen and the footman both ran after Peter, trying to get him to come back again.
Allan sat down on the nearest bench, watching Peter as he laughed joyously with a little envy lodged deep in his gut.
By the time Stephen and Peter came to take their leave, Allan knew exactly what he was going to do. He didn’t intend to confront Frederica with any big sweeping statements of affection or any declarations. Instead, he would show her incrementally, a day at a time, that he would always be there for her.
When he found her later that day in the music room, rather than playing the piano, she was humming one of the tunes to herself, looking at sheet music for the harp.
“Freddie?” he called to her. She looked up from the music, looking through him, like she had done the last few days, rather than at him. “Will you come for dinner?”
“Is it that time?” She turned and checked the clock over a mantelpiece. It seemed she had lost track of time completely. It reminded him again of just how lost she was truly feeling. “Oh, yes. Yes of course, I’ll come now. First, I’ll just change.” She moved past him without giving him a second glance.
Coming so near yet feeling so far from her made him ache all the more. His heart pounded in his chest as he watched her go. As she disappeared up the stairs, he moved into the music room and looked down at the harp sheet music.
It gave him an idea, a first step in showing her that here, she was completely free.
* * *
“My Lady? This has just arrived for you,” Mrs. Long said, entering the parlor.
“Oh, thank you.” Frederica took the letter woodenly, distracted, for she had still been staring at the swatches of curtain material, unable to make up her mind on what to go for.
“Is there anything you need?” Mrs. Long asked. The rather worried expression made Frederica ache all the more.
She was not ignorant. She had not missed that Mrs. Long, Lucy, and even Allan these last few days had been looking at her as if gunpowder was about to be lit. Somehow, their concern made it all the worse. It made her even more listless and confused by their worry.
“No, thank you,” Frederica said softly. Mrs. Long smiled comfortingly then left the room.
At first, Frederica gave no attention to the letter. She continued with her task, trying her best to ignore it, but in the end, she decided she would have to read it. She couldn’t suspend reality and live in this happy moment for too long.
Frederica broke the seal of the letter, not really paying attention to it at first. However, when she opened the letter, she was hit with a sudden scent. It made her gag. She realized at once who it was from.
She moved to the edge of her seat, staring down at the letter, trying her best not to let her fingers shake in fear.
My darling Frederica,
I cannot bear to see you turn your back on me again. You cannot persist in your ignorance of what we share.
I must see you. I must have you as mine. That husband of yours be damned, and maybe that’s what it will come to? Maybe that’s what needs to happen to him for you to see that we should have always been together from the very beginning?
There is no other way.
Come to me, today. I shall be waiting for you in the corner of Hyde Park where the streams intersect.
Come to me, and we will talk this through. You will see that we must be together.
If you do not come, that husband of yours will pay the price.
M.
A shuddered breath escaped Frederica.
I could never leave Allan!
The thought came to her suddenly and overwhelmingly. She leapt to her feet and ran from the room, hastening down the corridor, nearly tripping on the hem of her skirt though she narrowly managed to avoid doing so.
“Allan?” she called. “Allan?”
