“I have no desire to put an end to this engagement, no,” he said as truthfully as he could.Hewould not be the one ending the betrothal. “Are you having second thoughts?”
She put on a smile that did not reach her enchanting eyes. “Not at all. I just wanted to ensure that, in the nature of our literature discussion, we were on the same page.”
This will all be remedied when Daniel arrives,Evan told himself forcefully, ignoring his aunt’s words the previous evening. He would not be jealous—why, he would be thrilled for the happy pair if they could fall in love and be joyful together. And if it meant that he still got to enjoy some playful banter with Olivia from time to time, being her sort-of brother-in-law, then that could only be a benefit.
“Forgive me,” he murmured, wetting his dry throat with a fresh cup of coffee, “I must have been mistaken in my assumptions yesterday.”
Olivia narrowed her eyes. “Assumptions?”
“Mm, yes. I saw you conversing with Caro in the gardens and thought you might have been trying to find reasons to end our betrothal, straight from someone who knows more about me than almost anyone.” Evan did not know why he was saying such things nor why the words would not stop spilling from his lips, but it seemed his curiosity had taken the reins of his tongue, and he was helpless to seize back control.
The change in Olivia’s demeanor was instant, that flush in her cheeks returning as she endeavored to look anywhere but at him, her fingertips tearing at the crust of her toast. He had expected her response to satisfy or amuse him; instead, her reaction unnerved him. WhathadCaroline told Olivia to make her respond like this?
“It is rude to spy on ladies,” she remarked, filling her mouth with toast.
“I was not spying. You were sitting underneath my window and making rather a racket,” he replied, leaning forward in his chair, eager and fearful to hear what had been said about him.
Her eyes widened to the whites. “You heard us?”
“I heard squawks, but… nothing that resembled words,” he confessed, cursing himself inwardly. If he had not been so tired from dreaming of Olivia all night, he might have had the sense to pretend that he knew what had been said, tricking her into elaborating.
She visibly relaxed, swallowing her toast with a loud gulp. “We were discussing society,” she explained after a moment or two. “I was regaling her with stories of my debut and all the seasons I endured afterward. Though, now I am curious what she might have told me about you that could be awful enough to send me away? Can there be anything more awful than the tales I have already heard of you?”
That defiance had returned to her eyes, and Evan found himself longing for her shyness and her gentle concern again. He rather liked the softer side of her, the side that Caroline and Amelia seemed to be offered often, while he received the burn of her fiery contempt.
No, this is good,he chided himself.Stoke her resentment of you. Fuel it; do not seek to douse it!But he could not help it, faced with that flinty look in her eyes, her lips devoid of even the smallest smile. He wanted to bask in her brightness and splendor, not feel the chill of her coldest façade.
“I suppose not,” he said simply, though there were a thousand things worse than the fake gossip that circulated about him. Things he would have choked on a hundred pieces of toast to stop her from knowing about him. Contempt, he could bear. Pity, he could not.
Just then, the door blew open and gusted Caroline inside. She was tying a bow in her hair, and her hands froze, her expression puzzled, as she looked upon the two individuals at the small table.
“Where is Mama?” Caroline asked, resuming her tying.
“Taking a tray in her chambers,” Evan replied.
Caroline arched an eyebrow. “What? Why? That is not like Mama at all. Even when she is unwell, she drags herself into the breakfast room, so she can eat ‘like a civilized woman,’ or so she says.”
“You would do better to ask her,” Evan said with a shrug. “Now, if you would not mind eating swiftly, I was about to take Olivia to see Westyork Manor. You will suffice as a partial chaperone, dear Caro, though it might be best if I fetched Mrs. Parker before we depart—she will not intrude too much.”
Olivia cleared her throat. “You were?”
“Ah, that is what I meant to ask before this one barreled into the room.” Evan flashed what he hoped to be a rakish grin. “You will join me, will you not? It shall be a rather dreary walk if you do not, for I have seen Westyork Manor every day for… countless years. It would not be nearly as diverting.”
Olivia adopted a polite smile that left him slightly hollow, for he had come to crave her true smiles, the ones that made her glow from within. “Of course,” she said. “I would be delighted. Is that where the party is to be held for our engagement celebrations?”
He was no fool; she was trying to prod him into surrender, but it would not work. “It is,” he replied evenly. “In truth, I cannot wait. There are so many people that I am eager for you to meet, and so much dancing that I am keen to enjoy with you. I am certain that, in a more… public arena, my suspicions of your true grace and elegance will be confirmed. I shall be the envy of all who attend.”
Olivia stared at him, not with anger, not with contempt, not with amusement, but with something that frightened him far more than it should have done, with a real, unbridled fear that shook him. A fear that, for a moment, he would have done anything to take away.
I am teasing,his tongue longed to say.We do not have to dance at all. We do not have to do anything. We do not even have to marry if you do not want to. I give in, but… I do not yet give up.Fortunately, his mind had more sense than his tongue, and instead of saying something he would regret, he got up and moved toward the French doors.
“Shall we? Caro, you can carry some toast with you and breakfast on the way.” He flashed a sly look at Olivia. “I know you are fond of eating out of doors.”
Caroline did not seem to catch the pointed remark. “When it is a picnic, yes, not when I am trailing behind an affianced couple, pretending not to exist.” She chuckled. “But I shall make an exception, just this once. Do you think Daniel has arrived yet?”
“Let us hope so,” Evan murmured under his breath, striding out into the somewhat chilly morning air, his boots knocking the dew off the blades of grass as he headed for the main manor. He did not dare to look back in case Olivia was not following, but that expression of hers seared in his mind—her fear.
It will be over soon,he told himself, wishing he could see, ahead of time, how it would all end.
