“You did not notice we have been trying to speak to you,” Rose pointed out.
“Your tea is more fascinating than we are,” Harry added, chuckling a little. “Can it tell jests better than we can?”
Rose laughed with him, but neither of their parents did. Their moods seemed much more somber, and Charlotte wondered if it was because they could read her better, and guess at what was upsetting her so much.
“Charlotte, you have been this way every day for the last week,” Margaret pointed out. “You’re eating less.” She picked up another slice of toast and added it to Charlotte’s empty plate. “You must look after yourself. Please, eat.”
Charlotte buttered the toast dutifully and took a small bite. It tasted like cardboard in her mouth.
Who knew sadness could affect one’s body so much?
She sighed loudly, apparently the noise made her parents exchange nervous looks and fidget all the more.
“Something’s wrong with her,” Harry said aloud.
“Well done, constable,” Rose muttered wryly. “We could all figure that one out, thank you.”
“I’m quite all right.” Charlotte tried to raise her chin a little higher. She had a feeling that her aunt would be mortified at her behavior, not only pining for a man who was not completely proper, but also letting her pining affect her deportment somuch. “Rose, you said you needed some new shoes. I can take you into Covent Garden today.”
“I will do that,” Margaret declared suddenly.
Charlotte nearly dropped her toast in surprise. Charlotte had so often escorted Rose on such trips, it was just the done thing between them.
“I have a little money from recent investments,” David cut in, apparently reading part of what was on Charlotte’s mind. “Maggie, I’ll give you the money before you go. Perhaps you could buy something to raise Charlotte’s spirits too?”
“I do not need anything.”
“Would youlikesomething?” Margaret asked pointedly. “Sometimes, we all need a reason to smile.”
My reason is not coming back.
Charlotte’s foul mood she knew was not only because of a broken heart, falling for a man who was quite determined not to commit to her, despite the fact he must have cared for her a little, as he had kissed her. No, her mood had worsened further in the aftermath of their final meeting, where she had quite decided that she could not marry anymore.
Deep down, she knew it wasn’t worth trying. She would be miserable with any man she married. At least the money thatGerard had given her, she could now use toward her family’s happiness rather than her own marriage.
“What would you like from the shops?” Margaret persisted, adding a second bit of toast to Charlotte’s plate, though Charlotte showed no sign of even finishing the first piece.
“Nothing, thank you.” Charlotte shook her head.
Disappointed, Margaret slumped back in her chair.
“Leave her be, Maggie. She’s quite determined to be miserable,” David said offhandedly.
Margaret glowered at him, but it struck Charlotte as strange that her mother didn’t use this as an opportunity to argue with David. They so often bickered and used every opportunity they could to spar with one another. Apparently, today was a little different.
“Why don’t you go with your sister and mother, Harry?” David offered after some minutes of silence.
“Shopping?” Harry wrinkled his nose, and Rose elbowed him. “I’d rather empty all our chamber po –”
“Yes, thank you for your crudeness, Harry.” David cut in fast.
Rose laughed at Harry’s words, and even Margaret hid her laughter in a handkerchief. Strangely, Charlotte couldn’t formthe simplest of smiles. Yet neither did she want to reprimand Harry for his crudeness. She just tried taking another small bite of her toast.
“Yes, the three of you go to Covent Garden,” David urged, much to Harry’s disappointment. “Charlotte, you and I could take a turn in the garden, what do you think? You haven’t had any fresh air in days.”
She nodded woodenly, content to do as he asked, though she wasn’t sure why he was so intent on getting her outside.
A short time later, they had waved off their family in the carriage, and Charlotte was taken out into the garden by her father. He looped her arm through his and as they walked in silence with the wind bristling them, she realized that David hadn’t suggested this so much as to get her outside, but in order to talk to her alone.
