“Rachel,” Thomas cautioned.
“What? She’s going to find out soon enough, isn’t she? No one can keep their mouths shut about Father.”
Thomas sighed. “Father was a gambler,” he explained. “He associated with terrible people, and when he died, he left us with a mountain of debt that took years to escape. Our money is in order now, but our reputation was never fully restored. I think mother fears that I’ll fall victim to the allure of gambling.”
“You’re not gambling, though,” Madeleine observed.
“No,” Thomas agreed. “I never do. That’s why I play cards with Rachel. There’s no gambling to be done here.”
Madeleine nodded. It all made sense now.
She watched as they played a few more hands, pondering what Thomas and Rachel had just confided. Her parents hadn’t lived long enough for her to discover any of their faults, but she was sure they must have had them, just as everyone did. Perhaps she was lucky, in a way, to have been able to preserve the memory of her parents as flawless and perfect. It must be difficult to realize that your parents weren’t the heroes you thought they were when you were a child.
It made her feel sad to think of Thomas going through that.
She watched him as he focused on the cards. He really was extremely handsome. It made her want to reach out and put a hand on his face or perhaps touch his hair and see if it was as soft as it looked.
But he wouldn’t welcome such a touch.He had made that very clear last night when he had reminded her that the two of them didn’t share that sort of relationship, that their marriage wasn’t based on love. She’d known that, of course, but he had made her feel as if he didn’t want love to emerge between them.
It was all so confusing. She didn’t want that either! It shouldn’t be so troubling to her to hear that it wasn’t a possibility.
Unless shedidwant it?
Figure out what you want, Madeleine. Horatia’s advice echoed in her thoughts.Once you know what you want, you’ll know what to ask him for. Until then, there’s no sense in troubling yourself about what you think he wants.
“Did you have breakfast, Madeleine?” Rachel interrupted her thoughts.
“Yes, something was sent up for me.”
“I’d imagine you’d like one of these pies anyway,” Rachel said, pushing the plate over. “They’re wonderful. Try them.”
Madeleine picked one up and bit into it. It was filled with jam, and Rachel was right—it was delightful. A smile spread across her face. “That’s delicious.”
“They’re my favorite.” Rachel was beaming as proudly as if she had baked the pies herself.
Thomas looked up at Madeleine.
When his eyes met hers, she felt rooted to her seat. It was as if lightning was coursing through her body, making it impossible to move. She didn’t know what to make of the sensation, but she knew it was one of the most potent things she had ever felt in her life.
And then he reached up and cupped her chin in his hand, and she forgot how to breathe.
“You have a bit of jam on your face,” he murmured, wiping it off her cheek with his thumb.
Her heart raced madly. If someone had asked, she didn’t think she could have given her own name.
He withdrew his hand slowly. It felt as if he didn’t want to let go of her, and Madeleine had the mad desire to take a big bite of her pie and deliberately get more jam on her face just to see what would happen.
It took every bit of willpower she had within her to resist that urge.
She refocused on the card game, trying not to think about all the things she was beginning to want from her marriage to Thomas—all the things she knew she might never have.
CHAPTERTWENTY-FIVE
The card game ended—Rachel won, as she usually did—and they broke up and went their separate ways. Thomas didn’t mind. He thought his sister was probably trying to leave him alone with Madeleine. If he was honest, that was something he appreciated. He could use the time with her.
“I’m sorry I left you on your own this morning,” he said, though he had already apologized.
She shook her head. “It really wasn’t a problem,” she said. “I was just a little confused by it, that’s all. But I figured out what had happened in the end.”
