“Perhaps we could arrange something?”
“I’d really like that.”
I leave the room feeling Luca’s mother’s gaze on me. “She likes you! Bella doesn’t like many people; she’s not very sociable.”
“I like her too!”
“That’s good, soon we’ll all be family.”
I walk down the corridors following the matriarch of the Di Santis family; from the top of the stairs, I feel eyes on us; I feel them scrutinizing me, assessing my movements, looking for something to point out. I look around the hall in search of Luca and find him in the corner with my father and brother talking, clearly not paying attention to anything else. As soon as my feet touch the last step of the staircase, I feel my hand being held by someone. I look in the direction of the person, and it’s a man of some age with grey hair. I hold back the urge to pull my hand from his grip.
“So you’re the future wife of a Capo, interesting!” His voice is cold and indifferent, seemingly trying to affect me.
“My name is Chiara, Chiara Mancini…” his gaze seems irritated, perhaps by the correction, but I know that he doesn’t like my presence in general; it’s clear from the way he look at me.
His gaze travels all over my body and face, examining me without any shame. His look of displeasure makes my body cringe slightly by reflex; a dry laugh comes out of his mouth, and he looks at me with contempt. “I really don’t know how our Capo could have allowed you to get engaged to Luca, to be the wife of the future Capo of the Camorra, how he allowed a rich, spoiled little princess like you to reach this level in our institution. I only have to look at you to know that you’ll never be good enough for the job. My daughter would be the best choice, the right choice, a true mafia princess, born and bred. She would be a perfect queen, but instead of her, we’ll apparently get this”.
He points at me; I look around and realize that many are listening to the conversation, whispering and nodding slightly. Ared-haired girl shows a big smile, appearing happy, and I realize that it must be his daughter. Turning to look again, I see Luca standing a few paces behind him; from the expression on his face, I know he’s heard every word; he looks upset, deadly. I approach the man in front of me, standing just a few centimeters away from him. He looks at me confused, but still with an air of superiority; I open my mouth to speak and make sure I do it loud and clear so that everyone hears my words. Luca’s gaze falls on me, and I know I’m safe, that he won’t allow anyone to hurt me. And the truth is that if I want their respect, I just have to make them respect me; in this world, that only happens if I go and become the queen that Luca insists I am.
“Let me tell you a secret: queens are transformed, but it’s not a process; they are born. To be a queen, you have to be born a queen. I’m a queen, born and bred; I don’t need the Camorra to have a real empire in my hands, andI don’t need a wedding to become a queen. Moments like these, situations like these, and the circumstances in which we live are what distinguish royalty from the plebs! Looking at you right now, I can say for sure that your daughter will never be a queen because she wasn’t born to be one.”
His face flushes with anger, and he takes a step toward me, reaching out for my arm with the clear intention of hurting me. Before his hand can grasp my arm, Luca’s voice becomes loud, angry, and lethal.
“I’d stop right now if I were you.” The man in front of me frowns in frustration, and his body is paralyzed, without moving a single millimeter. “The woman in front of you is my fiancée, the future wife of the next Capo of the Camorra. I won’t tolerate any disrespect toward her; everyone must bow before her presence.” As soon as the words leave his mouth, Luca’s foot hits the back of the man who disrespected me, causing him to fall to his knees at my feet. “Beg for forgiveness!”
“I…”
Luca bends down slightly and speaks close to his face. “Beg for forgiveness, and maybe I won’t kill you today!”
The man lifts his head in the hope that I’ll tell Luca to stop, in the hope that I’ll interrupt his humiliation, but I don’t. I’m not good enough to do it; I want him to feel humiliated, just like I did minutes ago; I want it to hurt; I want it to burn; I want to see him devastated. I look in Luca’s direction, and he looks into my eyes with a murderous grin on his face. I realize that I won’t do anything to stop him, which makes me realize that maybe I fit easily into his twisted world.
“Beg!” Luca’s foot presses down on the back of the man in front of me, preventing him from getting up. I look at him, and he’s red; a mixture of humiliation and anger flashes across his face, and yet contempt is present in his eyes as he looks at me. Luca increases the pressure of his foot against his back, and not a word comes out of his lips; with a small gesture from Luca, Francesco, and Paolo come toward us and lift the man off the ground, each grabbing an arm. “Take him down to the basement.”
“No, I, Capo, please…”
Don Henrico looks at him with an ironic smile on his face. “Take him to the basement now, and don’t do anything to him; Luca and I will take care of it!”
Luca walks toward me and puts his hand on my waist in a possessive way. “Are you all right?”
“Yes, it was nothing. I was just waiting for someone to tell me they didn’t want me here, and he did.”
“He’ll beg you for forgiveness today, I promise!”
“I’ll have blood on my hands…” my voice comes out low and unsure; Luca stands in front of me, looking me in the eye.
“Blood will always be on my hands. Consider it my lesson to my soldiers. I am responsible; after today, you will remainintact; without a stain of blood on you, they will always fall on me, Chiara!”
“But I don’t want you to…”
Luca doesn’t let me finish speaking; a smile plays on his lips as he pulls me closer to his body. “I won’t feel guilty; killing him won’t take my sleep away; I’m a killer, maybe even a psychopath, as many like to call it. Killing is not a problem for me, and I’ve told you before, and I’ll tell you again so you never forget; I would easily kill for you, Chiara, without a second thought, without regrets; that’s who I am. The blood will be on my hands, and I don’t care about that!”
I look at him, and it doesn’t take me more than a second to realize that what he’s saying is true; Luca doesn’t mind killing, he doesn’t feel remorse, andmaybe he even enjoys it. Maybe someone else would see this as a big red flag, a sign to run away, but not me. With every passing second, my heart beats faster for him because my heart doesn’t care that Luca is a murderer; all it wants is for him to be mine.
“I’ll take care of it…”
I don’t let Luca finish; I take his hand, and I don’t let him get away from me. “What about all these people?”
“They don’t matter; I can send them home right now if that’s what you want. I promised you that he would beg for forgiveness; I will deliver!”
