“You’ll be damnlucky to get an opportunity after this! I can’t believe…I… All our plans are up in fucking smoke. You’ve thrown everything away, and for what? Or should I say, for whom? Caleb’s nice enough, but he’s not your future, honey. We’ve got your future all mapped out, and it doesn’t include being lovestruck at twenty-one.”
“Dad, I’m not lovestr—”
“You can’t seeit now, honey, but believe me, when you look back in a few years, you’ll thank God you didn’t throw your future away in the name of lust.”
The line goesdead as I disconnect the call. I don’t need to repeat any of it to Nora. She heard every word. Hell, my neighbors probably did too.
Without saying anything,I walk to the bathroom, strip out of Caleb’s shirt, and step under the hot spray of a shower. I need to wash this shitshow of a day off. And there’s no better place to cry than in the shower.
I wash my hair,and as the suds go down the drain and the tears fall, I think back to the summer I was thirteen. I think about the tears I cried over a mother who’d forgotten about me. I think about the boy who wiped my tears away.
And suddenly,I know exactly what I’m doing with the rest of my day.
* * *
Whit
The plane ride is great.That should have been a sign of impending doom. Flights are never great. But this one is. Smooth, quiet, quick. I grab my bag from the overhead compartment and make it out of the airport in record time. There isn’t even a line at Starbucks.
I should have known.
So,I am halfway to my car, scrolling through social media and sipping on an iced mocha when I realize I’ve ruined my girl’s life.
I’ve been following LifeReach,not because I remotely care about anything they have to say, but because Lucy is featured in a lot of their posts, and I want to support her.
Turns out,I did just the opposite.
I tossmy bag in the back and pull out of the lot and head north on the highway. Fuck this shit. What? I thought I could outrun it? I thought just because I fell in love I’d stop being a fucking curse to everyone who loves me? Jesus. I was a fucking menace at two years old, and nearly twenty years later, I’m no better.
* * *
Lucy
My call goesto voicemail again, but it doesn’t matter. I’m headed to his place whether I can get ahold of him or not. My Ryde driver drops me off on the Bainbridge campus, and I sniff out Drip out of sheer desperation for a caffeine fix. It suddenly occurs to me that the last thing I ate was the French Toast Caleb made me this morning. And it’s just past 4 p.m. Let’s hope they still have some danish.
The campus paths are tree-lined,and there’s a stately brick fountain not far from the coffee shop. On a warmer day, I could see myself sprawled out on one of the wrought iron benches, my head in Caleb's lap as I read and he plays with my hair.
The coffee shop is busy,as coffee shops usually are. There’s a blonde behind the counter, and she’s deep in conversation with a cute, petite brunette, but she pauses mid-sentence as I approach.
“Hi,welcome to Drip. What can I get you?”
“Hi,I need a venti flat white with an extra shot. And an almond croissant. And directions to The Chapel. Not necessarily in that order.”
She staresat me blankly then shares a look with the brunette, and I realize that maybe I was a little blunt.
“Sorry,”I smile sheepishly. “I haven't eaten in hours. I just flew in from Wisconsin, and I’m in desperate need of caffeine. I promise, after two sips, my manners will be restored, and my request won’t sound so creepy.”
The blonde smilesblithely but still seems unconvinced as she makes my drink. I take a bite of my croissant and nearly groan out loud.
“What chapel are you looking for?”the girl at the counter asks.
I shake my head.“You must think I’m a lunatic. It’s actually not a chapel, but a house. I guess it used to be a manse for the rector back in the day? Anyway, my boyfriend lives there and I’m in town for a visit.”
“Your boyfriend?”the girl questions, not bothering to hide her skepticism.
“Yes,my boyfriend. Caleb. I swear, my social skills are shit right now, but believe me when I tell you it’s been a day.”
“Caleb?”the blonde asks like she’s never heard that name before.
