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Charlie
“Son of a motherfucking dick!”The cacophony of car horns drowns out my stream of curse words, and we’ll just add that disappointment to the steaming pile of crap that is my day.
The intersection ahead of me is a blur of blinking lights from cars braking continuously, as they skid and slide in the layers of the slushy white stuff that cover the road.
And really, calling this snow is generous, which only proves my theory that Marylanders can’t drive in snow.
Sure, it’s white, and it’s falling from the sky, but… it’s more a nuisance than a major weather event. But since the Eastern Shore is not typically a winter wonderland, a few inches make these people lose their damn minds.
And that’s why I’m swearing like a sailor and slamming on my brakes to avoid hitting the row of cars ahead of me. Because, apparently, this is cautious driving? Stopping at a green light because there’s a dusting of snow on the ground?
If it weren’t for the magic that these people can do with a tin of Old Bay seasoning, I’d declare the whole state a loss.
I lay on my horn again and that seems to do the trick. The cars ahead of me begin to creep forward and for a glorious moment, I think I may just make it through this light cycle. But no.
Green turns to yellow and everyone on the road loses their mind, yet again. I glance at the clock on the dash. It’s 4:15 and I’m already late for my shift at Trick’s. And this slow-ass traffic is just going to prolong my tardiness. I’d call or text, but my phone is out of commission. And by out of commission, I mean smashed into about a hundred tiny pieces that lie scattered throughout my trash bin at home.
It’s been a day.
Hell, it’s been a week, a month, a year or three.
But, things are finally looking up. Or, at least, they will be once I finish my shift tonight and head back home to Syracuse for the holidays. And also for the foreseeable future.
That’s something my boss doesn’t know yet. And something I definitely need to tell him. But, in my defense, I only solidified my decision this morning. And yes, that was just before I decimated my phone.
For weeks now, my parents and my older sister have been after me to come home to Syracuse for Christmas and stay, since there’s really nothing keeping me on Maryland’s Eastern Shore these days. At first, I resisted. I didn’t want to be that girl-- the girl who couldn’t make it on her own, so she has to run back home to start over.
But I’ve recently (as of 4 a.m. today) come to the realization that being that girl is far superior to being the girl who falls asleep binging Netflix on the couch one night, then wakes up and wanders into her room only to find her ex-boyfriend and his current girlfriend fucking like bunnies on her brand-new duvet.
Yep, being that girl really sucks.
It also sucks that I still live with Brady, months after our breakup. But, we agreed, as the mature adults we are, that we’d continue to split the two-bedroom apartment until our lease was up in February. The truth is, neither of us can afford a place of our own right now. Brady’s band is always on the verge of making it, and I’m always on the verge of tanking my credit score because I loaned him money or covered his half of the rent and utilities.
Yep, being that girl sucks, too.
So, after I booted Brady and Katie (their names rhyme, for fuck’s sake) out of my bed and my apartment, I started packing my shit into my Volkswagen bug. I’m not supposed to head home until tomorrow morning, but I’m not going back to that apartment ever, so I figure I’ll drink caffeine all shift and see if I can make it to Scranton before stopping for the night. I took a power nap after spending the day boxing up my abysmal existence, and I’m a night owl by nature and trade, so I should be good for a while.
The prospect of moving back to my childhood bedroom is not high on my list of Christmas wishes, but I can’t stay here. I came here for Brady, and why the hell did I ever do that...who the hell knows? But I know one thing: I'm leaving for me.
Sure, I’ll miss Trick’s and all the patrons and my coworkers--even Trick himself, who’s usually just a pain in my ass. For a minute, I thought of taking my co-worker Tina up on her offer of renting the apartment over her garage, but seeing Brady and Katie’s bare asses in the faint glow of moonlight was surely a sign that I need to get the fuck out of Maryland.
I pull into the lot and I’m surprised at how empty it is. Sure, it’s a Wednesday night, but still. This just must be the lull. And if we have a light night, maybe I can cut out early and get a head start on my drive.
After backing into my space, grabbing my bag, and locking up, I pop the windshield wipers. If snowpocalypse is coming, my car is ready. That ridiculous thought puts a smile on my face for the first time today.
