Willa: Later this week? We can do Wednesday?
Knox:Damn it. I’m heading back home to go to my brother’s holiday concert at school. But you and Rose are welcome to come. It might be a late night, but I’d love to have you both with me.
Willa:Um, a road trip might be a lot for her. Tuesday night? You can come over for the evening, around 6:30? Do bath and bedtime with me?
Damn it. There are so many things I want to say, but I keep my damn mouth shut, knowing full well that if I say anything suggestive about getting Willa in a bath or putting her to bed, she'll shut my ass down and I’ll lose what little footing I’ve managed to gain.
Knox:Great.
Knox:Hey, I wanted to ask, what kind of car seat do you have? I should probably get one.
The silence that follows my text tells me I’ve taken things a step too far.
Willa: I’m not sure you could even get a car seat in your car? Does it even have a back seat?
Shit. She’s right. And once again, I’m the dumbass.
Knox:Fair point. I’ll figure that out.
Willa:There’s no rush, Knox. Rose and I do just fine. I mean, you are welcome to be in her life, if that’s what you want, but it doesn’t have to be an everyday thing.
There’s no way she has any clue how deep those words cut. I take my time responding, choosing my words carefully.
Knox: You don’t trust me now, and I get it. But I’m going to earn your trust Willa, yours and Rose’s.
There’s no response for a minute and then she sends back a thumbs up. A fucking thumbs up, which is essentially the universal emoji for “Fuck You”. But it’s fine. She doesn’t need to believe me now. I have no problem proving myself.
* * *
“Oh my God,Whit, we are not buying that bear. It’s ten times Rose's size. It’ll scare the shit out of her and give her nightmares.” I never should have asked Whit to come shopping with me. I just wanted to get a couple things for Rose at my place, and since he has a huge-ass SUV, I figured that was a better bet than my sports car.
But we’ve only been here half an hour, and we have two full carts. I shoot off a quick text to Willa to settle the heated debate Whit and I have been embroiled in.
Knox:Foxes or owls?
Willa:What are you talking about?
Knox:Doesn’t matter. Just pick one.
Willa:It totally matters. If we’re talking team mascot, then definitely foxes. They’re sly. But if you’re talking about a pattern for a lunchbox or something, definitely owls. They’re cute.
Knox:Thanks. I was right.
Willa: You’re not making any sense.
Knox:I’m with Whit. He likes the foxes, but I said you’d like the owls.
Willa: What are you doing????
Knox:uhhhhh…. nothing.
Willa: Where are you?
Knox: Target. It’s not a big deal. We just came to get a couple things for Rose, and we couldn’t decide on sheets.
Willa: Sheets? Oh my God. If you bought a crib…
Knox:Is that bad?
