Opal
Two monthslater
Leaning back onto the bench, I flip through my notebook. Words of love. Loss. Heartbreak. They sit on the lined paper, mocking. Taunting. I haven’t been able to write a thing since he left. The hurt isn’t fresh anymore, it’s morphed to a numbness that clouds everything I do in shades of melancholy. Even my smiles don’t come naturally. I have to force my lips to feign joy I don’t feel.
He ruined everything.
Lexi comes out of the bedroom dressed for the day and her lips painted red. The guys left to play a morning show hours ago. She pours a cup of coffee, but the aroma I once craved now sends my stomach rolling. Again, another thing he ruined.
Lexi settles in the seat across and glances at my notebook and pen. “Writing?” The hope in her voice is clear.
“Trying to.” I sigh and slam the book shut. “Not having much luck.”
“You’ll get there.”
My cell vibrates on top of the table. I glance at the caller ID even though I already know who it is.
“Him again?” We don’t say his name around here. It’s an unspoken rule everyone abides by for my sanity.
I nod and send the call to voicemail. A message I’ll only delete.
“Do you ever listen to them?”
“No. I don’t think I can handle hearing his voice.” It’s bad enough I hear it in my head, my mind conjuring dreams of us together again.
“I get it. I do.” My sister worries her lip as she meets my stare. “But don’t you think it’s time?”
“Time for what? Moving on?” My face crumples under the heaviness of the situation. Tears spring into my eyes but I blink them back. “Because I’m trying, Lexi. I’m really freaking trying.”
She reaches for my hand and squeezes. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just, I miss your smile.”
I open my mouth to argue but she’s right. I don’t have the same zest for life. Leighton took more than my innocence. He took my joy. And he left me to clean up the pieces of my broken heart.
“Come on, get dressed.” She pushes from her chair. “We’re getting out of here.”
“Don’t the guys get back soon?”
She shrugs and goes to the sink to wash out her mug. “Yeah, and they can find their own lunch. You and I are overdue for a girl’s day.”
I nod, because I love this about my sister. Her no-nonsense, take charge attitude leaves no room for argument. The beginning of a smile, a genuine one I don’t force, turns up the corners of my lips. “I’d like that.”
* * *
The hurt doesn’t go away,I don’t think it ever will, but overindulging on pizza and taking a walk along the boardwalk reminds me that I’ve been missing out. I haven’t been living lately. Not to the fullest.
Lexi and I talk about our pasts. We tell stories from our childhoods, funny moments and sad ones too, and for the first time in weeks I find myself laughing. I don’t want to move on from what I shared with Leighton, but I have to. There’s a life I’ve been given, and I won’t waste it. Not anymore.
After a few hours, we decide to head back. On our way I notice the convenience store we passed earlier. I nod at the sign. “Hey, do you mind if we stop in here?”
“Sure.” She tilts her head in question.
“I’ve been craving gummy worms.” I shrug. “Since we’re already indulging, I figure why not.”
“Yes!” My sister slings her arm around my shoulder. “Now you’re getting the hang of this.”
We walk inside and within minutes she’s recognized. A few people interrupt, shocked and overwhelmed they’ve encountered Lexi Marx in the wild. Soon we’re swarmed by a small crowd of fans who want her to sign their shirts, paper receipts, and more. She’s patient and takes time to talk with each person, but it’s apparent there’s no way we’re shopping.
“You get the gummy worms. Reese’s for me?” she says as she scrawls her name onto someone’s phone case.
