There was no escape. There were no options. My lies had taken me too far to turn back now. “She is looking forward to meeting you as well,” I confirmed. “But hey, let me let you go. I know you’re a busy man.”
“Sure, no problem. I’ll email you the contact.”
“Thanks again, Mack.” The phone clicked, and Mack’s name faded from the screen, leaving me still clutching my phone in my hand.
So slowly that I felt like I could hear my joints unfolding, I lowered the phone until my hand rested limply against the cool marble of the kitchen bar. I should have known marriage was too big a lie to maintain for long.
I bet Mack wants to make a big media spectacle out of my wedding,I realized, discomfort crawling in my gut.Bring in photographers, take pictures for sports magazines, announce it to the heavens. Here’s our new general manager. You already know him because he played on the team! And look, he just got married to his beautiful high-school sweetheart! We’re so family oriented and full of integrity here at the Lexington Colonels. Buy tickets to our games!
I was in this way too deep to come clean. And I did really need the money since no other opportunity other than a few TV ads had come my way. Certainly not enough to support the lifestyle I was used to. So there was only one option - only one thing that would keep me from getting fired from the job I just got. I needed a fake bride, and not just any woman would do.
It had to be Tammy. Mack knew her name, her occupation and the name of our hometown. I had even mentioned bits of our rocky past, so it would sound like we had overcome distance, miscommunication and all other forces that might stand against us to find love again.
Finding a stand in for Tammy was pointless when Tammy herself lived right here in the Hamptons. And she planned weddings, so no doubt she had probably seen some pretty crazy reasons for people to marry. Being my fake bride might not even chart on her list of the craziest wedding stories.
Soon, though, I needed to figure a way to get Tammy to buy into this outlandish scheme, but I needed help with how to approach her - in a way that she wouldn’t laugh me out of town, or remind me that only a jerk - a very desperate jerk - would dig himself into such a deep hole with a stupid lie.
I needed expert advice - someone or maybe two someones to help me get out of this unbelievable mess. Luckily, today was Thursday and Riker, Zeke, and I would convene at the Hamptons Peak in a few hours, allowing me the perfect opportunity to hit them up.
After waiting two hours that had to be the longest two hours of my life, we were finally sitting ensconced at a table for three. When I explained what was on my mind, their initial reaction was to laugh, shake their heads and ask the cocktail waitress to bring us doubles of whatever we were drinking.
“Really?” Riker leaned forward, as the reality of what I had said sunk in. “You didn’t at any point think it would backfire on you?”
“I didn’t expect him to ask for a wedding invitation,” I muttered sourly, unable to deflect the valid criticism.
“You should have,” Zeke huffed.
“Okay, I get it,” I sighed as I crossed my arms over my chest. “I messed up. It’s too late to change anything now, though.”
Riker palmed his hair, shifting from patiently amused to thoughtful. “Can’t you just elope? It would be easier to convince Tammy to elope than to stand in front of a crowd in a white wedding gown and recite fake wedding vows. Eloping would just be like a vacation for you both. Then, after a time, get a divorce. That’s what a friend of mine in college did when his father threatened to cut off his inheritance if he didn’t get married before the old man died - he was terminally ill, of course.”
“Huh.” I tapped my fingers to the beat of the current song the band was playing, giving this new idea some thought. That would certainly be easier. No cameras and no Mack to see through the deception. But… “I don’t think that’ll work,” I said reluctantly. “Mack knows I’m not that kind of guy. I think he would be suspicious if I didn’t want my close friends to attend the ceremony… And, well, I already specifically mentioned a wedding. Knowing Mack’s motivations, I think it’s best just to have an actual fake wedding. I’m sure of it.”
“With Tammy?” Zeke added. “Didn’t you both hate each other until a week or so ago?”
“We didn’thateeach other,” I protested. “We just needed to clear the air. We’re good now.”
“Good enough to pull this off?” Riker asked with a straight face.
“Maybe. That’s why I’m asking for your input… No, wait,” I interrupted myself. “Tammy told me she was having trouble getting local, well-heeled, clients to book her for their weddings.”
“There you go. That’s perfect,” Zeke sounded encouraged. “Now, we just have to find a way to hook her up with those clients.”
“I’ve got an idea,” Riker spoke up. “What if we threw you a party at my mansion? A party to celebrate you getting the manager’s position with the Lexington Colonels. A lot of folks around here will be glad to see you back with one of their favorite football teams. Zeke and I can get the list of members who belong to the club here. With those connections, Tammy’s business will really take off. Everybody that’s anybody living in the Hamptons belongs to the Hamptons Peak Club.”
“That’s ingenious! I could make introductions, and just casually mention at some point that I have a proposal for her… literally,” I joked.
“Exactly.” Zeke rubbed his hands together. “Claudia will make sure Tammy comes to the party. And she’ll make sure she brings business cards.”
We finalized the plans, then set into our usual ritual of playing cards, but I was so excited I had trouble focusing on the game or our conversation for the rest of the evening.Our plan was perfect. I would help Tammy grow her business, and, in turn, she would help me secure the job I needed.Your proposal better be an impressive one… One Tammy can’t refuse…
