“What’s wrong, darling?”
“Nothing.” Evie wiped her eyes, laughing quietly. “I’m just happy. And relieved. I thought…”
She stopped. She was quiet for a long moment, looking for the words to say.
“You said you couldn’t love anyone. You said you weren’t made for that, so I… I assumed…”
“I thought that was true. There are many laws that govern my existence. My kiss is supposed to be lethal and my being undeniable. I’m not supposed to feel you as I do. And I wasn’t made to love another.” Natalya smiled and caressed Evie’s cheek. “You’re breaking all the rules.”
Evie smiled too. “Sorry, I guess.”
The comment made Natalya chuckle.
“How long have you had these worries?”
Evie blushed at the question. “Not sure. You said you weren’t able to love anyone, and I wanted to respect that, so I just… I tried to ignore it. But I think I knew the night you were attacked. I thought you were dead, and it—”
Evie cut herself off. Her lip trembled, and she leaned against Natalya again, hugging her fiercely.
Natalya had held Evie like that enough times to recognize it. The desperate embrace of someone afraid to let go, lest the person they were holding would slip away from them.
“It was the same for me,” Natalya said. “I realized the night after you were almost taken. I couldn’t tell you then. But in hindsight, I knew before. I just didn’t know what I was feeling.”
Natalya stroked Evie’s face, brushing away her tears. “I have been desired before. Adored and even worshiped. It isn’t easy to do those things without it consuming you. I fear loving me will be just as difficult.”
“It’s not,” Evie said quickly. “It’s easy. You make it easy. You understand, and you… You’re warm. You’re kind and careful with me.” She pressed her face against Natalya’s shoulder. “It isn’t difficult to love you, Natalya.”
The words summoned awe and fierce protectiveness alike. Adoration and wonder. A little confusion. With the destruction she was destined to wreak, being in her arms should bring nothing but pain, Sin, and madness.Lovingher was supposed to be impossible. It should be an addicting thing fueled solely by Lust. It should be ruinating. It shouldn’t beeasy.
But to Evie, this remarkable woman, it was that. And knowing it made Natalya hug her tighter than before.
“I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you. I think I’d rip the world apart if you were ever taken from me.”
“Something probably will happen,” Evie said sadly. “Every time I think I’m safe, they come for me again. Maybe it won’t stop ever. Even if Varro’s gone, someone else might try to take me instead.”
Natalya leaned away, taking Evie’s face in her hands. “Anyone foolish enough to do that will feel pain fitting Sin. I’ll shout it to the world so everyone knows the suffering that awaits should they hurt you. You are mine. As long as I exist, I will happily destroy anyone who’d dare threaten you. I will do anything to make sure you’re safe.”
Evie looked at her with wide, green eyes. Eyes that shouldn’t have seen the horrors she’d endured. That, if the Fates were kinder, shouldn’t be looking at Natalya at all. Evie should be in a different life, somewhere far away and safe, where monsters weren’t trying to own her.
Evie’s mouth trembled a little, but she smiled through it. “You promise?”
She said it knowingly. With intent. And in her eyes, Natalya saw the importance of the question. She trusted Natalya’s promise without hesitation. Relied on it, even. Promising her something like this was as easy as breathing.
Natalya kissed her softly, then a little deeper as Evie pulled herself closer. “I promise, Evie. For you, I’d promise anything.”
“I don’t understand it.” There were tears in Evie’s eyes. But she was still smiling. “I don’t know why I got to be this lucky.”
To hear Evie refer to herself as ‘lucky’ was a new type of pain. The tragic, sorrowful kind. With all she suffered, she feltluckyto be where she was now. In a building full of monsters, with her arms around one such creature.
But Natalya had suffered as well. Sometimes she forgot that. She ignored the pain of it and pushed it away, but it was still present. And despite it, she felt lucky too. If she hadn’t gone through it all, would she have ended up here? With this woman leaning against her? There was no price too high if it meant she got to love Evie until the end of her days.
“There’s nothing I want more than to keep you safe,” Natalya said. “Which is why you have to go. For a little while.”
Evie leaned back, intense worry filling her eyes, but Natalya pulled her near again.
“It’s only temporary. Until Varro is dealt with, I want you far away from the Court of Chains. Somewhere safe. Somewhere unknown to him.”
Evie’s eyes grew vacant. Maybe she was distancing herself from what was happening, like she’d done before. Removing herself from the fear building in her. Natalya caressed her arms, trying to bring her back to the present.
