Chapter 25
Malcolm
The meal was chaotic. It always was. Year after year, Mom insisted everyone needed to sit at the table. It wasn’t that big, and more often than not, you ended up with someone’s elbow in your side or a drink knocked over into one of the side dishes. This year wasn’t any different.
“So then my boss tells me that if I have one more day where I show up with glitter in my hair, I’m at risk of losing my job. It’s insanity because try telling that to a five-year-old.”
A little girl giggled at the end of the table, but my cousin Marisa didn’t seem all that amused as she finished telling her story.
“That doesn’t seem fair. Can they really do something like that?” Mom’s co-worker, Selena, asked.
Marisa sat back in her chair, clutching at her wineglass and taking a large sip before she answered. “I don’t know. Something about professional appearance and all that. I’d get it if I was where the customers could see me, but I answer phones all day.”
I looked to my right, where David was still digging into his plate of food. He was on his second helping of most things andsomething about all of it… made me hope. For the first time in years, the meal didn’t feel suffocating. We weren’t focused on who was missing from the table.
“So, what exactly do you do, David?”
I sat up a little straighter at Stewart’s question. He’d actually behaved pretty well. I kept waiting for the moment when the inappropriate questions would start, but it was still early, and they still could.
He reached for his napkin in his lap, wiping at his mouth while my heart rate spiked. How would he explain it? Would he tell my whole family how he’d hired me to run his advertising campaign? Would they care?
“I make websites. Different things. I like easing accessibility. It’s a shame there aren’t more options for people who struggle. Those who have a hard time seeing, reading, comprehending…”
Everyone stared at him, and I tried to hide how uncomfortable the change in conversation made me feel. My palms were a sweaty mess as I lifted another scoop of mashed potatoes and gravy to my mouth, and I almost dropped the fork.
“Oh? You know Malcolm does advertising. He could really help you sell something like that.”
All eyes turned to Stewart, and I kept eating even if everything I tried to swallow now lacked flavor and felt like a lead ball traveling to my stomach.
David didn’t answer at first. He picked up his bottle of beer and took a swig before looking at me and then back at my family. It was getting harder and harder to pretend that the conversation didn’t affect me.
“I’m well aware of what Malcolm does.”
That got a laugh out of Stewart, but you could now cut the tension at the table with a knife. No one else found this amusing like he did. My cousin had always been bad about reading theroom. It appeared my time of him not saying something stupid had run out.
“Oh yeah? Is that how you two met? You hired him after he gave you a good performance?”
Aunt Pam smacked him on the back of the head before grabbing him by the arm and hauling him from the table. It didn’t matter that the man was twenty-six. His mother had no problems with treating him like he was still five when he wanted to act like a complete idiot.
But… there was no recovery after that. Utensils clattered to plates as everyone pushed their way out of their seats. Leave it to Stew to ruin a good thing.
My ears burned as everyone walked away. Everyone except for David. He still sat at my side as I fought back tears. It was all so damn humiliating and exactly why I hadn’t wanted to pursue anything. Everyone had opinions. I’dearnedmy position. There had been no favors exchanged. Sometimes, you can’t convince anyone of that.
“Are you all right?”
I finally set my fork down with a little too much force. It made the loudest clattering sound, but it also could be thanks to how empty the room now was. Or maybe I was just more aware of it. Who knew? My elbow rested against the linen tablecloth as I rubbed at my eyes. I really wasn’t okay. How did I keep saying the same thing over and over again, even when I wanted something completely different?
“I don’t—I don’t really know. That sort of puts things in perspective for me.”
“What do you mean?”
I let out another sigh before turning to face him. God, I hated the look on his face. We’d had the best day yesterday, and I was about to shit all over it. I couldn’t keep playing this hot-and-cold game with him. David deserved so much better than that.He had to see what I was dealing with. Maybe he wouldn’t be so upset?
My knee bounced as my fingers itched to grab hold of anything. To hold on and squeeze and provide some sort of relief for my racing thoughts. How was this my life? I’d shoved every single person away and then I met the one person who finally gave a damn and I can’t have him. What the fuck, world? I’m over this.
“It’s always going to be like that, isn’t it? When people find out whatyoudo… and knowing whatIdo… they’ll assume the worst—”
“Would you stop?”
