Taking a sip from her wine glass, Ella rolled her eyes. “Yup.” She threw her hands in the air. “He’d never even really played tennis before.”
“Why did he take you out to a tennis court then?”
“Fuck if I know! Men, I guess.” She giggled tipsily.
I shook my head in disbelief. “The audacity.”
“Right?! Even if his serve would’ve been better than mine, that’s still a stupid first date.”
“So, in short, your dating life is a tragedy.”
Ella pursed her lips. “Told ya.”
“Not trying to be a bitch, but that’s probably the one time reality is actually worse than anything I could’ve come up with.”
“I might just give up completely,” Ella groaned, burying her face in her hands. “I doubt there’s anyone around here who could even give me what I want.”
As the sun set, the humid air finally cooled down a bit, so we decided to move our girls’ night out onto the tiny balcony of our apartment.
It was just big enough for two chairs, and we’d doused ourselves in mosquito repellent, but it was worth it to me. I’d missed those late summer nights outside, talking and drinking until long after the stars had come out.
“And what would that be?”
She studied me for a moment, her eyes slightly narrowed. “No judgment? This stays between us?”
Taking a sip of my drink, I nodded. “Yeah, yeah. Hit me. I’m into some pretty questionable stuff, too. Honestly, red might be my favorite color.”
A splash of wine splattered over my hand as I gestured a little too dramatically.
“I don’t … ugh, this is way harder than it should be.” She took a deep, calming breath. “Look, I don’t want flowers or dates. Couldn’t care less about all that cute, romantic crap. It just doesn’t doanythingfor me. What I’m into … it’s twisted. Not normal. And yeah, I like things a little dark, a little nefarious. If you catch my drift.”
“That’s very illuminating,” I deadpanned.
Ella hesitated, but my curiosity was piqued, so I pressed on. “But I know what you mean.”
“You do?”
“Okay, well, I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone about this, but I’ve always had this thing for … well, I guess I’m kind of intobeing fucked when I’m asleep. I’ve always been a heavy sleeper, and I had this one boyfriend who woke me up like this once. It was the hottest fucking thing.” I said wistfully.
“Why do I sense abutthere?” Ella was twisting a strand of hair between her fingers.
“Because once I told him about it, basically giving him permission to do it more often, he dumped me. Said I was weird, and he thought I’d been awake all along that first time.” I shrugged.
Back then, his words had hurt me, but I was over it now.
Seemed like I had a habit of choosing people who aren’t worthy. A goddamn pattern.
I took another generous swig of wine, pushing the thought aside.
“What a douchebag.” Ella shook her head, scoffing in disbelief.
“Tell me about it. I mostly just don’t mention it to guys I’m dating anymore. Not worth it.” I sucked my teeth. “But, Jesus Christ, what I wouldn’t give for some dude to magically appear and dick me down while I’m sleeping.”
“Some dude, or my brother?” She waggled her eyebrows at me.
“No comment. So, yeah … that’s my deep, dark secret,” I said, trying to change the course we were heading for. “You going to tell me yours?”
Ella grabbed her whole-ass ponytail and started twisting the hair. “Ugh, fucking hell.”
